


Matthew in Wonderland

by killerkitty15



Category: Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Related Fandoms, Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Alice In Wonderland AU, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Attempted Murder, F/F, F/M, Fantasy, Flashbacks, Fluff and Smut, Human Experimentation, Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Infidelity, M/M, Magic, Mental Instability, Mutation, Non-Graphic Violence, Out of Character, Politics, Recovered Memories, Secret Relationship, Sibling Incest, Slash, Slavery, Slow Burn, Torture, loosely based on Alice in wonderland, referenced sexual servitude
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2018-10-17 05:09:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 30,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10587087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerkitty15/pseuds/killerkitty15
Summary: Lured to Wonderland by a White Rabbit, Matthew tries to find his way out and unwittingly finds himself in the middle of a struggle for political power between the Heartless Red Queen (the Queen of Hearts) and those that are still loyal to the previous monarchy. Unfortunately, this tug of war involves Matthew much more than you think as he struggles to exit Wonderland and find who he truly is.





	1. Down the Rabbit Hole

**Author's Note:**

> This story is being transfered over from FF.net and editted  
> Main Pairing: Prussia x Canada  
> Hetalia characters and their relation to Alice in Wonderland characters will be placed at the end of each chapter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice meets the White Rabbit, an event that is oddly written by the author.

I don't know why Father decided it would be a brilliant idea for me to study with Alfred. I love my twin brother, don't get me wrong, he absolutely has his good points, but he is, at the end of the day, a total idiot. 

We're in the garden, surrounded by pretty flowers and the multicolored butterflies and all I wanted to do was pick flowers and, _yeah,_ I know, _I know,_   it's “unmanly” but, give me a break, I'm fifteen!

Our empty tea cups sat at the base of the tree and an unopened copy of Romeo and Juliet sat in my lap. I had read it on my own and had been excited to discuss the common themes throughout the play and how it connected to modern life with my normal tutor, a lovely young woman who had a romantic soul that rivaled my own. Unfortunately, she had gotten sick and I was stuck with Alfred. Alfred, who was sitting up in the tree and not even talking about Shakespeare.

"--yeah and, bro, I want to be totally real with you right now. This chick was so fucking -I don't even know!" he gushed, laying on his back and swinging his legs in the air, barely missing my head, "She had this fucking amazing Russian accent and, dude, you should have _seen_ her cleavage."

"That's lovely, Alfred," I sighed, caressing the front of my book; I lifted it and looked at it sadly before hugging it to my chest. "I'm sorry Romeo," I whispered to the book, "I promise I will know your easily applicable themes soon. I will come for you Romeo, your true feelings will be revealed to me."

"Mattie, you say somethin'?"

I sighed, "No, Al, I didn't."

"Hm, that's what I thought!" Alfred cackled obnoxiously.

I leaned back against the trunk of the tree, turning my face up to let the sun rays that were being filtered through the canopy of leaves caress my face. _I really want to do something fun,_ I thought, _Al isn't really fun. I mean, he’s fun, but not really my type of fun._

Tilting my face back down, something on the edge of the forest caught my eye. It was a tall, pale, well dressed man. An _attractive_ man!

He had pale, almost translucent skin, broad muscles and messy white hair, a strong jawline, thin, pink lips and an aristocratic nose that looked like it had been broken a few too many times and never healed properly. This man was wearing a Prussian blue coat that ended just above his knees with a flipped up collar and wide sleeves, grey trousers tucked into knee high black leather boots, a black waistcoat with a blue heart pattern, a pressed, bright white shirt and a black cravat. This finely -richly -dressed man made me feel inadequate as I had decided to wear my worn gardening clothes for my time with Alfred, which consisted of brown trousers, calf length black and white striped socks, a periwinkle ribbon holding my wavy hair into a ponytail and a loose white blouse with too long sleeves and a hemline that ended at the bottom of my thighs.

What _really_ got my attention, though, was the tall, white rabbit ears sticking up from his white hair.

He pulled out a pocket watch, flipped it open and looked at the time. The man scowled slightly before flipping it closed and placing it back in his coat pocket; suddenly, he looked up and his eyes fell on me.

His eyes were crimson red and I couldn’t stop the quiet gasp that pressed passed my lips, the beauty and rarity of such a color rendering me almost incoherent. I was caught in his gaze and, when he smirked, I blushed. It felt like I was being cut open and looked at, my insides twisted outside my skin and placed erotically on display for this strange, wonderfully compelling, appealing man that had appeared like an angel.

 _Come on, Birdie,_ he mouthed, lifting his finger and motioning me towards him, _Come with me._ _  
_

I wanted to ask where we were going but I couldn't open my mouth, still rendered dumb by the sight of him and the emotion that pressed and clawed unexplainably beneath my breast. I found myself rising to my feet and walking steadily towards him, my stocking feet made no noise as I walked through the garden and in his direction.

Alfred continued to talk, not noticing my departure.

"Who...who ar-are you?" I breathed, looking up awed and breathless.

He graciously bowed. "Hallo, Birdie, I am known as the White Rabbit," the albino said with a slow spreading smirk, one that sent a delicious shiver down my spine, "but you can call me Gilbert."

" _Gilbert_ ," I said, liking the way his name tasted, "Gilbert, where are you taking me? Where are you going?"

"On an adventure," Gilbert said, taking my hand and leading me into the forest, his expression soft, "It's actually more like a journey. To find your true self."

"Why? Why are you here?"

"You...You really _don't remember_."

I was caught off guard by his heartbroken expression -and the strong reaction it pulled from me, my heart screaming in reply, begging me to reach out to him and wipe that look from his face with all the tenderness I had to offer -and I pulled on his hand to stop him. Reaching up to cup his cheek, feeling the rough, scratchy skin beneath my fingers, I gave him a regretful look, "Non. I'm sorry."

Yet, this all felt oddly familiar. Like...we had done this before, like we had met before.

"It...It is alright, Birdie," the white rabbit said, placing his hand over the one I had on his cheek, "You will remember eventually."

"...if you say so."

We began walking for a second time, comfortable silence enveloping us, holding hands as if that was what our hands were made to do. Gilbert and I came to a stop in front of a snarled, twisted, old tree, at the base of which, covered over and partially hidden with roots, was a giant hole that seemed big enough for a grown lumberjack to fall through, dark with no ending in sight.

"This is the rabbit hole I came from," Gilbert explained, looking at it with obvious distaste, "You will have to go down there. I won't be able to go with you, the...the Queen won't allow it. I will try to help you out as much as I can, but...we won't meet face to face for a while. I'm sorry."

"It's...ok?" I responded hesitantly, "So I just...drop down?"

"Ja."

"Alright. I'll...see you around?"

"Hopefully," Gilbert said with a small smile, gripping my shoulders gently before bringing our lips together. I gasped but my hands on his shoulder blades despite my shock and pressed harder against him. It felt so...so _right_. As if we were meant for each other. There was no tongue, just our lips melding together gently, slowly, tenderly. "I'm sorry but you'll be late otherwise," he said against my lips, giving me one last, drawn out kiss, "Ich liebe dich, mein Birdie."

That's when he pushed me.

I fell, breaking through the roots and falling into the rabbit hole. I screamed, falling into pitch blackness, clawing at the dirt around me and trying to find something to hang onto but finding nothing but dirty, rocks and fragile roots.

Almost crying with relief when I saw light at the end of the tunnel, I tried to slow myself down, but failed, and I started tumbling faster, falling out of the tunnel and slamming onto the floor. My body slammed against the floor, a scream escaping my lips as the pain rattled my teeth. I curled up on my side, whimpering, but I somehow managed to struggle to my hands and knees. I looked around at the room I had fallen into, breathing heavily. It was a circular room with black, cracked walls with white doors of all different sizes, the floors were black and red tile, there was a small, square glass table with an amber jug and a small key on it.

"Merde..." I mumbled getting to my feet, dusting myself off and spinning around, absorbing my surroundings, "Where am I? What am I supposed to do?!"

 _Take the key on the table and find thee door it unlocks._ _  
_

It sounded like Gilbert's voice and I was compelled to obey by a bone deep need to please him. I approached the table and grabbed the key that was no bigger than my pinky finger before looking around once again. There were ten doors in the room and I went from door to door, testing the key. None of them opened.

"Goddamn it!" I yelled in frustration, looking around the room, trying to find a door I had missed; that's when I saw the thick, red velvet curtain. I approached it and shoved it aside, seeing a door that was as big as the calf on my leg. I kneeled down and unlocked the tiny door with the tiny key, it worked and I pulled it open, pressing my face closer to the small doorway as I breathed a sigh of relief.

What I saw amazed me.

On the other side of the doorway was a remarkable garden. There was grass so green that I wasn't sure if it was grass at all, florescent blue, pulsating mushrooms the size of houses, thin, twisting trees with black bark and pink spotted leaves; there were giant butterflies landing on equally giant flowers and strange, mutant animals as well as a black and white tiled road leading through this strange garden from the small door.

"This...it's..."

 _Awesome?_ _  
_

"Oui," I breathed with a small smile, "Absolutely awesome."

 _Go through the door, Matthew._ _  
_

A pull in my gut warned me that trying was useless and considering otherwise made me a moron. Despite this nagging feeling, which was probably correct, I tried to squeeze my way through but my head was too big and the door was too narrow. "I-I can't fit!"

 _Shit...forgot about that...on the table is a jug. You see that? Drink it._ _  
_

"Why? What does it do?"

 _Just trust me, liebling._ _  
_

With a sigh, I stood up, taking the key with me; I walked to the table and picked up the jug, reading the label. "Maple syrup," I read, then flipped the label tied to the neck of the jug, "Drink me." I stared at it for a minute, weighing my options. A man I had just met was telling me to drink some strange liquid, a liquid that I had no clue as to what it was, what was in it, or what it tasted like. _To hell with it_ , I decided, pulling the cork loose and bringing it to my lips. I gulped down some of it, finding that it tasted really sweet but not unpleasantly so; I took another gulp, some of it leaking from my mouth and dribbling in a sticky mess from the corner of my lips and down my chin.

_Fuck, how the hell did you make drinking that look erotic?!_

I blushed, choking a little and slamming down the jug, wiping the syrup off my face before glaring at the ceiling where I thought, maybe, Gilbert’s voice was coming from.

 _Oops, did I say that out loud?_ _  
_

_"Oui!"_ _  
_

_...Sorry..._ _  
_

I huffed, my face still red in embarrassment as my stomach flip flopped, feeling itchy and anxious beneath my own skin for something I couldn’t quite name. That was until I felt my bones breaking. I screamed, waves and waves of pain crashing and rising and undulating through my body; I felt my skin being yanked and manipulated, giving me the distinct feeling of being torn asunder, and I couldn’t stop two stray tears from falling from my eyes onto the ground that was rushing up to meet me.

And then, just like that, it was gone.

I peeled open my heavy eyelids -when had I closed them? -and looked around; everything seemed...bigger. Or was I smaller? Yeah, I was definitely smaller.

 _I'm sorry I forgot how painful people said it was. I'm a hybrid so I never have to take it._ _  
_

"A...A hybrid...?" I croaked, my throat dry from screaming.

 _Ja, me und mein bruder. The queen had us as servants but...Ludwig fell in love so he was kicked out of the castle._ _  
_

"You've never been in love?" For some reason, I felt my heart starting to hurt, tears making my throat thick. The thought of this man not loving made my heart ache and break a thousand times over.

 _...I have...but...the queen needed a servant so she took mein love away from me. She wanted to break mein spirit._ _  
_

"And...d-did she?"

 _Did she...? Nein, she didn't. She just pissed. Me. Off._ _  
_

"Oh..." I looked around, then looked down when I felt a breeze on my legs, _"Where are my pants?!"_ _  
_

_You must be too small for them...Kesesesese~!_ _  
_

"What are you chuckling about?!"

_...Nothing..._

"Yeah, that's what I thought," I mumbled, "And where's the key?"

 _FUCK! You left it on the table!_ _  
_

"...God damn it...!"

 _Wait, well, fuck, here eat this._ _  
_

Suddenly, in a poof of violet smoke a stack of...something appeared. "What are those?"

_Pancakes..._

He sounded sad and I bit my lip, feeling guilty, but trying to fight the feeling back to where it came from.  "What...What do these do?"

 _They should make you bigger, that way you can grab the key then shrink down again._ _  
_

Looking at these _pancakes_ , I got the feeling that this probably wasn't the best idea.

 _Trust me._ _  
_

I bit my lip, finding myself unable to say no to him, especially with the knowledge that I had made him so sad earlier. I picked up the fork that was laying beside these... "pancakes" and took a bite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alfred/America as The Sibling of Alice (for now, hint, hint)  
> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit


	2. The Pool of Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice almost drowns and experiences some sort of memory/dream that the author reassures is important to the plot.

I felt my bones breaking and shifting, I could hear them creaking as my skin loosened and sagged. I squeezed my eyes shut, not wanting to risk seeing what was happening to my body, gritting my teeth against the pain.

When it all stopped I opened my eyes and straightened my spine- only to hit my head against the ceiling. Wait... _ceiling?! What?!_   
  
"Gilbert?!" He didn't answer and I was starting to panic. "Gilbert, answer me please!"

He still didn't answer me and I began to bang on the walls and ceiling. "G-Gilbert?!" I screamed, pushing with all my might at the area around me, frustrated and scared, tears spilled down my cheeks. They ran in streams down my face and landed in fat drops on the floor. "Gilbert! Help me! _Please!"_   
  
Why wasn't he answering?! _Why?!_   What did I do?! Is it because of what I said?! All the little things that held no meaning to me but everything to Gilbert?! _"Gil..."_ I whimpered, tears falling and, strangely enough, they began to pool around my ankles, soaking my socks.   
  
_You have to find your true self, liebling._  
  
"B-But I don't know who I am!" I cried, banging on the walls, "I want to get out! I-I want...I want you to answer me!" 

_Why?_  
  
_"I've always been alone!"_ I sobbed, my tears up to my knees, _"No one_ notices me! Alfred's the special son even though I'm way smarter! All they think about is finding a nice girl for Alfred, they never think about me! No one does! And the few friends I have...th-they think I'm him most of the time!" My tears were up to my waist. "I just want someone to notice me! _To care!_ Y-You're the first person in so-so long that has...that ever noticed me first and remembered me!" The tears were up to my shoulders and I was gasping for air. _"Th-That was my first ki-kiss, you bastard!"_   
  
_...you're almost there mein liebe._   
  
Suddenly, I found myself shrinking and I fell into the water. The cold, salt water of my tears filling my lungs as I gasped and clawed at the surface, trying to get above the water. But I couldn't. I couldn't get air and I couldn't breathe, my vision and brain going fuzzy as I got dragged further into my ocean of tears.   
  
_It's ok, Birdie, I got you._   
  
Despite everything, I gave in and my vision went black.

* * *

_Flashback_

 

> We met at a party, as cliché as that is. Our whole meeting was cliché, I guess.  
>    
>  We were dressed in our finest, the best money had to offer.  
>    
>  I was wearing and ivory dress with sheer sleeves starting from my shoulders and going to the first knuckle of my fingers, the sleeves had white embroidery on the sides facing outward -the pattern resembled chess pieces. The bodice wasn't sheer, instead it was solid ivory silk with more white embroidered chess pieces at the hem line, giving way to an ivory colored, full, tulle skirt that lightly dragged across the floor. I also wore clear, glass heals that I walked gracefully in, managing them like a professional. It was not uncommon, here, in the society and world I had existed in for my entire life, for young men and boys to dress like women or girls. Older men, in their thirties onward, tended to wear more manly clothing like trousers and jackets. I had just turned sixteen, actually this party was for my sixteenth birthday, so it wasn't odd that I was wearing a dress, heels and wearing a diamond encrusted choker and diamond studs in the cartilage of my ears.  
>    
>  The King and Queen -Mama and Father -had finally let me try alcohol, to which I was excited. I made sure not to drink too much of the icy, blue liquid that was of a low alcohol content.  
>    
>  A chute of the liquid, known as Piquant, was clutched loosely in my hand when I saw him. I had been listening to a rather interesting gentleman that made hats, I do have to say he was rather quite mad, and he -Gilbert -was behind him and talking to someone else.  
>    
>  Gilbert was dressed just as nicely as everyone else at the party. He was wearing a black leather coat that ended just below his hips with numerous buckles and wide sleeves, black trousers tucked into black knee high boots, a red waist coat with black, heart shaped buttons, a crisp, black shirt, a black cravat with a heart shaped, red ruby pinned in the center. He looked absolutely roguish, even with his rabbit ears and fluffy rabbit tail. He was handsome and eye catching, although, Gilbert was always eye catching, no mater what.  
>    
>  You could never ignore the White Rabbit, at least not for long.  
>    
>  He looked away from the man, with brunette hair and a small mole, he was talking to and his eyes met mine.  
>    
>  A blush bloomed on my cheeks, how could I not? How could I not blush when his crimson eyes, like something out of a dream, were looking at me intently? How could I not blush when I felt like he was trying to look into my soul, and I was all too willing to let him?  
>    
>  He smirked, slowly and gradually, forcing me to look away and turn my attention back to the hatter least I burst into flames. Or my stomach explode with butterflies, or my heart clench up into a heart attack.  
>    
>  Why must someone be blessed with such a sexy, handsome face?!  
>    
>  "Matthew, my darling, won't you come with me?" Mother said, touching my elbow gently. I jumped, startled, and she giggled. "We have royal guests. The Queen of Hearts, your Auntie, is here."  
>    
>  "Yes, royal mother," I said. I smiled apologetically at the hatter, curtseying. "I'm terribly sorry, hatter, perhaps we can continue this later? I am afraid I must greet my aunt."  
>    
>  "Of course, of course, time is of no matter! It's always tea time!"  
>    
>  "Yes, hatter, yes," I said with a small smile as I turned and left the madman and made my way to the thrones Mama and Father sat in and, hopefully, one day, I would sit in with my king. Or queen. I wasn't picky.  
>    
>  Mama and Father weren't sitting, at least not at the moment. They were standing and smiling pleasantly at Auntie Natalya, better known as the Queen of Hearts, and Uncle Ivan. They ruled side by side as siblings instead of husband and wife.  
>    
>  Auntie wore a silk gown that clung tightly to her curves with a thick strap over her left shoulder and a slit up her left side all the way to her thigh, it sparkled with sequence. She also wore extremely tall black heels, black silk gloves went all the way to her elbows, red ruby rings and bracelets on her left arm. Her hair was curled up in an elegant bun, a red ribbon in her hair, her lips were painted bright red while her eyes were rimmed with thick, black eyeliner and a heart shaped ruby the size of the palm of my hand was hanging on a gold chain above her breasts.  
>    
>  Ivan wore something simpler. A red military coat buttoned up to his neck with his military badges on the left side of his chest, red trousers, black leather gloves, oily black shoes -not boots- and a back cape draped over the right side of his body.  
>    
>  "Ah, Matthew!" Mother said pulling me to her side, "Matthew, my dearest, this is your Aunt Natalya and Uncle Ivan. Brother, sister, this is your nephew."  
>    
>  "Hello, it is a pleasure to meet you," I said, curtseying immediately, "Thank you for coming to my birthday party, your majesties."  
>    
>  "He is so polite, big sister," Ivan said with a gentle, childish smile on his face directed at me. I blushed and tentatively smiled back, making him laugh. "And so cute, big sister~!"  
>    
>  _"Precious,"_ Natalya said bitterly, raising her chute of black, hissing liquor -known as Indulgence -to her lips.  
>    
>  "We have brought our servant," Ivan said, detecting his little sister's pissy attitude, "Would you like to meet him, Matevy? He's really quite something."  
>    
>  "Matthew would love to meet him," Father said with a chuckle, sipping on his chute of Piquant.  
>    
>  "Very well," Natalya said with a sigh that made it seem like what she was doing was a great task, as well as, a great inconvenience to her, _"Rabbit, get over here!"_  
>    
>  The White Rabbit, the albino from earlier, was at her side within seconds.  
>    
>  "You called, my queen?" he said, bowing low to her.  
>    
>  _His voice is so intoxicating!_  
>    
>  "Da," she huffed, "Your king wanted to show you off to our relatives. And... _the birthday boy."_  
>    
>  I almost flinched on the harsh tone of her voice, but I didn't; instead, I smiled at the White Rabbit and curtseyed. "Bonjour, I am Matthew, prince of the Queen and King of White. It is a pleasure to make your aquantance."  
>    
>  Gilbert smirked, turning my insides into a chaotic mess. As I stood up straight, he bowed, deeply. "Hallo, I am known as the White Rabbit," he said, taking my hand between his, he brought it to his lips and kissed my ring, the one with the family crest of the lion and the unicorn. I blushed bright red, his breath ghosting over my skin and his lips so, so close to actually touching my hand. "But you, your highness, can call me Gilbert."  
>    
>  I smiled, feeling my insides quiver in desire.

* * *

 I suddenly broke through the surface of my ocean of tears, coughing and sputtering the water from my lungs as my dream -or would it be memory of some kind? -ended. I flailed, only to find a pair of arms wrapped around my chest and legs that were kicking on either side of me. Relaxing some, I let whoever this was paddle through the water, until I was harshly shoved up onto the shore. The shore felt soft and, when I looked down, I realized the shore was made from shredded paper.  
  
"You should be more careful~!" a voice scolded, although it sounded like whoever this person was was scolding a child, "You almost drowned!"  
  
"Not...not my fault..." I croaked, looking up at my savior, "But...B-But tha-thank you for saving me."  
  
"No! I couldn't just let you drown, bambino!" the girl said, "Nonononono! That wouldn't be nice at all!" The girl had curly, red tinted brown hair in a ponytail, a red ribbon holding it up, big amber eyes and a petite, curvy figure. She wore short overalls and black thigh high socks, dripping wet from the ocean of tears; she had on no shirt beneath the overalls and I could see her black and red lace bra.  
  
Oh, did I forget to mention, she had big mouse ears on top of her head and a slim, skinny tail as long as her body? Because she had those, too.   
  
"U-Um, I'm Matthew," I said with a shy smile and a blush -the girl was half naked. Was I _not_ supposed to blush? -as I stood shakily onto my feet, "Who-Who are you?"  
  
"Who am I...? Who am I...? Oh! I'm Daisy! Oops, I mean, I am known as The Mouse but you can call me Daisy, bambino!" she giggled, grabbing my hands between hers and holding them between us, dangerously close to her breasts might I add, "Oh your so adorable~ I could just eat you! But, I'm a vegetarian and I have my own amour to eat~! Come on, come on, I'll bring you to the Dodo and the Lory, that way we can get dry!"  
  
"O-Oh..." I said, my head suddenly hurting with how excited and cheery she was, "Me-Merci."  
  
" _Eep~!_ You sound like Chesh! I can't wait to show Lory, I bet she'll think you make the Chess Language sound cuter than he does! You definitely sound cuter, but I still love big brother! He's not that bad when he's not being a total pervert!"  
  
"That sounds...lovely..."

What the _hell_ did I get myself into?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit  
> Natalya/Belarus as The Red Queen/The Queen of Hearts  
> Ivan/Russia as The Red King/The King of Hearts  
> Daisy/Nyo Italy as The Mouse


	3. The Caucus Race and a Long Tale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice dries off in a way that probably doesn't help much. The Queen of Hearts also gets a chance to step into the spot light for a moment and, let the author tell you, it is not pretty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALSO! 
> 
> I'm using characters and inspiration from Alice In Wonderland the novel, not the movies (Disney, Tim Burton or otherwise).

Daisy grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the shore with a strength that was incredible considering her gender. The shredded paper ground turned into hard leather, like a hard covered book. She pulled me along, up an incline until we came upon a rather strange area. It was a platform surrounded by hard covered books -laying vertically and horizontally -larger then two people standing on each other's shoulders. There was already a boy there, sitting on large books turned on their sides.  
  
The boy had long, white hair in two braids and grey feathers braided into them, long black nails that looked like talons, violet eyes -a small mole under his right eye -and an ahoge sticking up beneath the red beret he wore. He wore a blue pinstripe shirt, a black bow tie, a white vest made out of feathers, dark grey shorts, and legs and talons a dirty yellow. He sat with his legs pulled close to his chest, his chin resting on his knees.  
  
_"Eaglet!"_ Daisy called, running up to him and dragging me along, "Look who I found! It's the Ali-."  
  
"Prince Matthew of the White Kingdom," I said without thinking. When the words left my lips, I blinked, confused. Where did that come from?   
  
_Well, I fell in a rabbit hole...got kissed by the albino rabbit that the hole belonged to...almost drowned...yeah, that could have something to do with it..._  
  
The Eaglet and Daisy wore surprised expressions on their face, but soon the Eaglet's face smoothed into an unreadable expression. "That's not something you want to brag about," he said, straightening his legs, "I prefer to be called Aden, by the way, not Eaglet. Do you want to see the Dodo and the Lory?"  
  
"Oh si!" Daisy said, clapping her hands. She grabbed by hand again and dragged me with her, following Aden the Eaglet. I noticed he had two, tiny wings on his back.  
  
"Oh, the Duck is here so...he and Dodo will be fighting. Most likely. Surely."  
  
"They always fight~."  
  
Aden nodded and, sure enough, the sound of fighting could be heard. The voices belonged to two men, and as we rounded a corner, I could see the two men standing -face to face -and yelling at each other.  
  
One had brunette hair with violet eyes and a small mole beneath his eye, looking remarkably like Aden. He wore a jacket made out of blue and purple feathers, matching trousers, his yellowish feet looked like talons with black nails sticking out from the trouser legs, a crisp white shirt and a white cravat with a small, black onyx pinned in the center. A cane was gripped in his purple gloved hand and he looked exceedingly aristocratic.  
  
The other male was blonde with green eyes and was extremely pissed. He wore a small, green top hat with a beige feather sticking out of it, a cream colored jacket with two wings protruding from the back, stretched out with feathers ruffled in irritation, tan trousers and, through the leg holes I could see duck-like webbed feet, a bright blue waistcoat, a crisp, white shirt, a green and brown checkered cravat and brown leather gloves. He and the brunette were arguing with each other angrily, feathers flying about as they gesticulated with their arms. 

 _"Dodo, Duck, I've brought the Alice!"_ Daisy called, waving excitedly.

"A-Actually, I'm not -my name's not Alice," I tentatively butted in, though I'm sure no one heard me, as I lifted my hand in an awkward wave.   
  
They both stopped mid argument, turning to look at the three of us rather awkwardly. "Ah, Aden, you came as well?" the brunette said, raising an eyebrow.  
  
The Eaglet shrugged, "I was waiting where we were supposed to be waiting."  
  
"Ah," he said uneasily, "Good boy."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"You are the Alice?" the Dodo asked, turning his attention to me.  
  
"Uhmmm...?"  
  
"He is!" Daisy exclaimed, "Introduce yourselves guys!"  
  
The Dodo sighed, "If you insist." He bowed to me before saying, "Hello, I am the Dodo otherwise known as Roderich. It's a pleasure to meet you, Alice. Or do you prefer Matthew?"  
  
"Matthew is fine," I blushed, waving my hands frantically in the air. Wait...I don't think I told this guy my name... _did I?_  
  
"Very well and this is-."  
  
_"I can introduce myself, you cheap son of a bitch!"_ the blonde snapped, fists clenching and stomping his webbed foot. He turned to me, much calmer with an emotionless, polite, look on his face. "Hello, I'm sorry you had to witness that. I'm Vash. The Duck. And much more well mannered than this fool over here." Vash punctuated his statement by jabbing his finger at Roderich.  
  
The Dodo tsked, hand tightening around his cane. "Never mind you, stupid Duck," he hissed, suddenly looking at me and Daisy with concern, "Look at you two. Dripping wet all over my books, you'll ruin the leather! I make these book covers by hand, you know, sell them throughout Wonderland. I am the best book seller and leather maker in-."  
  
"You're the _only_   bookseller and leather maker around, twit."  
  
A muscle jumped in Roderich's forehead and he glared.  
  
"Darling, a caucus race might be just the thing to save your dear leather books."  
  
I jumped at the new voice added amongst these. I turned, finding a beautiful woman emerging from a book. She had long brown hair with a red flower resting in it and green eyes framed by thick eye lashes, she wore a red dress cut low to reveal her cleavage and the yellow lace of a corset underneath, the sleeves went to mid-thigh and gradually faded to green with feathers at the hem of the sleeves and the skirt of the dress was made out of loose fabric, the red gradually fading into yellow with feathers at the bottom of the dress, two wings that matched the coloring of her dress coming from her back and folded, relaxed, and her bird-like talons, similar to Roderich's but different coloring peaking out from beneath the dress. 

 _Beautiful..._  
  
Her green eyes, sharp and observant, turned to me, catching me staring. I blushed bright red, looking down at my wet sock covered toes and shirt, the left side of my collar sagging from the water and revealing my freckled shoulder. I was wet and my shirt was see through, revealing my blue underwear and my nipples that were hard from the cold. I was sure that I must look like a drowning, sopping rat in her eyes, a spec of dirt on her polished talons--.   
  
"You are the Alice?" her voice was soft, accented.  
  
I nodded shyly, shrinking back a little and gripping the bottom of my shirt that was at the bottom of my thighs now, because of the water.  
  
_"Matthew..."_ she hummed softly, causing me to look up at her. A motherly smile was on her face, reassuring, and her eyes sparkled with recognition. "You have finally come to save the Queen...Ó, édes Istenem, köszönöm," (Oh, dear God, thank you) she gasped, hand over her mouth and she shook her head, strands of hair whipping and curling around her face, "Matthew..."  
  
"O-O-O-Oui, Miss Lory?" I said, guessing this was the other person Aden mentioned.  
  
"Have you regained them?" Lory asked, taking a step towards me, "Your memories, you-."  
  
"I told him you're the Lory. He doesn't remember. _Yet,"_ Aden said quickly and sympathetically.  
  
She stepped back, hand on her chest, blushing and looking embarrassed. "Igen... Igen, I should have..." she looked up at me, smiling self consciously and gently as she curtseyed, "Helló, my name is Elizabeta. Please, all my friends call me that, not Lory." Elizabeta turned, looking at the Dodo, "Férj, shouldn't you start the caucus race? I have prizes in my pocket~."  
  
"Very well, everyone line up!" Roderich ordered, pointing to a random spot on the floor. I fell in line with the Dodo, an indifferent Aden, an excited Daisy and an irritated Vash, still slightly confused on what Elizabeta had been saying. "Frau? Will you be joining us?"  
  
"No, I think I will sit here... read to you as you race," the Lory said, taking a small, black book from a pocket in the skirt of her dress.  
  
"If you insist, Engel."  
  
My heart violently jumped into my throat, choking me and bringing my breathing to a halt before my heart beat stopped completely, becoming a dead, black weight in my esophagus. That name... that name ... _that name._

* * *

  _Flashback_

> A hand, pale and rough from a life that was unkind, ran up my leg. The owner of the hand, face hidden in the darkness of the room, seemed to be mesmerized, feeling and taking inventory of every inch of my skin, of my body, so laid bare and naked and displayed. The room was dark but beams of moonlight fought through the sheer lace of the curtains that were blowing gently with the breeze, giving me a pleasant view of his well muscled arm, long fingered hand and the middle of his chest to his abdomen. A scarred chest, old wounds from battle and conflict criss-crossing over his chest -some dangerously close to his heart and on top of his lungs -jagged and painful near his toned abdomen, the evidence of someone having attempted to slice open his gullet.  
>    
>  The hand traveled, slow and gentle, starting from the bottom of my foot. The hand -male, so very, _very_ male -traced the arch of the sole of my foot, his fingertips followed by his entire hand, gently pressing down and gliding up. My toes twitched, it tickled slightly, but I didn't want to ruin the moment so I held still, my fingers curling and uncurling in the white cotton of the sheets beneath me. Beneath us.  
>    
>  His hand traveled up from my foot to my ankle, caressing the fragile, poking out joints, and up the curve of my calf. Lips began to follow, brushing my skin gently over my ankle, making me arch my back slightly and my breath catch. He gently caressed the soft inside of my knee, giving it a gentle kiss on the side as his hand got to the back of my thigh.  
>    
>  _"Beautiful..."_ _  
> _  
>  His voice was heavily accented, familiar and warm like liquid fire, seeping into my veins and into my heart. The red organ in my chest stopped, soon restarting with renewed vigor.  
>    
>  "N-Not as beautiful as you," I retorted, my voice trembling and stuttering as his face was level with my inner thigh. I was naked, chest rising and falling in quick succession, with nothing but a thin, white sheet covering my left leg, my vital regions and part of my right hip. The duvet cover was somewhere at the end of the bed or, more likely, on the floor, long since cast aside since it would only impede our purposes. Purposes and plans that had been planned out in whispered tones and only in the safety of the other's presence, plans and purposes only remembered alone in the cover of night.  
>    
>  "Now you're being ridiculous," he breathed, pressing feather light kisses to the soft, fleshy, untouched skin of my inner thighs, "No one can compare to you."  
>    
>  I spread my legs wider, welcoming him with fervor. My back arched in desperation, skin looking paler than it usually did in the moon beams and my freckles an almost harsh contrast.  
>    
>  His cheek nuzzled against the skin he had just kissed, like a domesticated feline, loyal to their owner and master. "You're beautiful, gorgeous, celestial in the moonlight. As if you were made to be part of the moonbeams and the stars," he said, raising his body slowly so we could be perfectly aligned; he cupped my cheek -face still in shadow -as I shifted so his hips were comfortably resting between my legs with my fingers dancing along his shoulder blades. "You are _prefect..."_ _  
> _  
>  I tilted my head, brushing my nose against his and our breaths mingling.  
>    
>  _"...An Angel..."_  
>    
>  His right arm slipped beneath my back, raising my torso up so that we pressed more firmly against each other, and his left hand sliding down my neck than back up into the back of my hair. He gripped it tightly, tugging it back so my throat, alabaster in all its virgin glory, was exposed for him.  
>    
>  Hot, wet breath caressed my pulse point and I gasped. His breath seeped into my pores, stretching them as his breath dug into my bone marrow, awakening my skin. Lips, thin and wet with saliva, planted themselves on my neck. They caressed and worshipped in a manner so desperate and seeking it bordered on heretical levels.  
>    
>  "Mein."  
>    
>  I felt the scrape of teeth, a shiver going up my spine in pleasure as it was stalked by the hot trail of a tongue, wet on my neck and soothing.  
>    
>  "Mein Engel."

* * *

My body jerked, as if awakening from a dream. I looked around to see I was still surrounded by books and strange, beautiful people that knew me without introduction and knew what was safe and what was not.  
  
I looked over at Elizabeta, finding her staring at me with focused, demanding eyes. I looked away.  
  
"The finish line will be over there," Roderich said, pointing to a book with "The Scientific Theorem of Hattery and How It Affected the Stability of the Royal Houses in the First to Tenth Century -First Edition" written in green letters on the cover, "Liebe, give us a count down, will you?"  
  
"Egy..." Elizabeta began flipping open her black book, "Két..." -everyone got into a running position -"Három!"  
  
Everyone began running in different directions. Daisy scurried beneath books and papers and leather, Roderich kicked off a book, seeming to float in the air before approaching another book and kicking off that and Vash was doing the same thing only he was trying to hit Dodo every time, the two of them leaving a trail of molting feathers. I ran in between them, weaving through books and pages and making zig zags as I ran.  
  
_"Lo! Death has reared himself a throne_ _  
__  
__In a strange city lying alone_ _  
__Far down within the dim West,_ _  
__Where the good and the bad and the worst and the best_ _  
__Have gone to their eternal rest._ _  
__There shrines and palaces and towers_ _  
__(Time-eaten towers that tremble not!)_ _  
__Resemble nothing that is ours._ _  
__Around, by lifting winds forgot,_ _  
__Resignedly beneath the sky_ _  
__The melancholy waters lie."*_ _  
_  
My steps faltered, tripping and almost falling to my hands and knees. I looked around, brushing my hair from my eyes. Elizabeta was sitting on a stack of books, the book she had pulled out from her pocket in her lap. Her brown hair was falling over her shoulder, her voice clear as she read the poem from her book.  
  
_"No rays from the holy heaven come down  
On the long night-time of that town;  
But light from out the lurid sea  
Streams up the turrets silently-  
Gleams up the pinnacles far and free-  
Up domes- up spires- up kingly halls-  
Up fanes- up Babylon-like walls-  
Up shadowy long-forgotten bowers  
Of sculptured ivy and stone flowers-  
Up many and many a marvelous shrine  
Whose wreathed friezes intertwine  
The viol, the violet and the vine.  
Resignedly beneath the sky  
The melancholy waters lie.  
So blend the turrets and shadows there  
That all seem pendulous in air,  
While from a proud tower in the town  
Death looks gigantically down."*_  
  
My heart thrummed in my ears as I turned, seeing Gilbert, the White Rabbit, waiting for me at the finish line. A smirk was on his face as he leaned against the Hattery book, red eyes dark with something that I couldn't even begin to describe or imagine.  
  
_Come on, Birdie, my Birdie,_ Gilbert mouthed, hand stretched out and beckoning, _Come with me. You know you want to._  
  
I did. So badly, my heart and my veins were singing with it. Not singing, exactly, screaming. They were screaming and creaking and my bones, legs that had once been so loyal to me, betrayed me now. Or perhaps they helped me. They launched my body in his direction, my path straight and sure with a purpose.  
_  
"There open fanes and gaping graves  
Yawn level with the luminous waves;  
But not the riches there that lie  
In each idol's diamond eye-  
Not the gaily-jeweled dead  
Tempt the waters from their bed;  
For no ripples curl, alas!  
Along that wilderness of glass-  
No swellings tell that winds may be  
Upon some far-off happier sea-  
No heavings hint that winds have been  
On seas less hideously serene."*_  
  
My lungs expanded, pressing against ribs, arms pumping at my sides. "G-Gil!" I managed to pant out, getting closer and closer to my goal. Tears started to burn the back of my eyes. "You're ok! You haven't left me!"  
  
"Nein, of course not," the albino said easily, he opened his arms, folding me against him. His heart thrummed beneath my ear, calming me as our heart beats synced up and beat as one. "I will never leave you." He ran his hands through my hair and I melted, fisting my hands in his jacket. "I will protect you." I felt my eyelids droop as his arms surrounded me, lifting me off the ground and holding me tightly.  
  
_Never let me go. Never let me go...  
_  
"You're mine to protect, Birdie."  
  
_And you're mine,_ I thought before my eyelids closed and darkness took over, white rabbit ears and glittering red eyes visible in the black.

* * *

She tapped her nail against the cold gold of her throne, the black padding with red hearts matched the color scheme of the room. Black and red tiled floors, red rug leading from the two thrones high up on a platform to the doors of the throne room, red velvet drapes on the long windows (they had a pretty red and gold stained glass pattern), the black walls, the gold tiled high ceilings and the couches and chairs with frames made of gold and padding that was either solid black or red. Her throne, like her king's, was gold framed with the heart pattern, only the hearts on his throne were black with a red background.  
  
Her king...  
  
She looked over at Ivan, her brother that she wished so desperately wasn't. It wasn't that she hated him, far from that and exactly the opposite. She loved him so much, it was a burning in between her breasts and in her abdomen. All Natalia wanted was for her big brother not to be her big brother, so he could embrace her at night, lay her down on warm sheets, spread her legs and... _well_... you get the picture.  
  
At the moment, Ivan was not in the throne beside hers where he was supposed to be. Instead, he was sitting at a set of table and chairs for two, talking to one of the courtiers of their court. He was in a heated, but seemingly pleasant, discussion with an Oriental man in a red silk robe, decorated with a golden dragon, an emerald as its eye and red rubies and orange garnets as the fire blowing from its mouth. Slippers had been daintily placed on his feet, his long hair braided over his shoulder, his feminine hands holding his black cigarette holder (which contained a cigarette) and his feminine, alluring, exotic, Oriental eyes half lidded as he gazed and smiled, twinkling laughter falling from his cupid's bow lips. Ivan seemed to be having a good time with the courtier -Yao -with his face changing expression every few minutes. At one moment he would be smiling and booming laughter would erupt from his chest, then the next moment his brow would be scrunched up, mouth twisted in anger, then his eyes would be cast down, shoulders hunched, hands clenched together and adam's apple bobbing as he fought down tears (Natalya had entertained the thought of beheading Yao for making her darling brother cry, but she had to keep reminding herself that Ivan was capable of doing that himself... and Yao's family had always been loyal to the crown) and, then, the next moment, he would be smiling and laughing again.  
  
It confused Natalya at great lengths but she tried to control her jealousy. She did have actual business to take care of... not that she wanted to. Natalya really didn't want to do this, not again, when she thought this was already over and done with.  
  
_Why can't these two idiots give up?! What the hell is wrong with them?!_  
  
"M-Milady?"  
  
She was snapped out of her bitter thoughts by one of her servants, Toris the Frog. He was dressed all in green, which matched his frog-like eyes and green tinted skin. Just like a frog.   
  
She smiled, cold and threatening, "Da, Toris? What the fuck do you want?"  
  
Toris winced -like he should. "The Alice...Matthew was seen by the Pool of Tears... he was running a caucus race with the Dodo, the Eaglet, the Duck and... the L-Lory," he said meekly, shrinking back as Natalia heard the name of her sister's most loyal servant and growled. _No, friend. Sister calls them friends._ "Then... he disappeared. B-B-B-But! But, we think either head to the Rabbit's house" -the queen snarled, banging her fist against the arm of her throne, which hardly got a glance from the courtiers gathered in the room -"the Duchess' mansion or the Hatter's... place."  
  
She relaxed her shoulders, growling to herself and tapping her nails irritably on the arm of her throne. "Alright...Yes. Go away."  
  
Toris bowed before walking as quickly as he could out of the throne room.  
  
_I'll handle this... this time, I'll kill Matthew. I don't care if he's my sister's child, he trying to take away my most faithful servant! My only hybrid! He will die!_  
  
A smile slowly spread across her face and she began to giggle, laughing hysterically.  
  
"Sister?" Ivan questioned, brows furrowing in confusion, he didn't move away from Yao or even get up out of his seat, "What's the matter? You're acting unstable, da?" Yao smiled at this, smothering his giggle by taking a drag from his cigarette.  
  
_"But lo, a stir is in the air!_  
_The wave- there is a movement there!_  
_As if the towers had thrust aside,_  
_In slightly sinking, the dull tide-_  
_As if their tops had feebly given_  
_A void within the filmy Heaven._  
_The waves have now a redder glow-_  
_The hours are breathing faint and low-_  
_And when, amid no earthly moans,_  
_Down, down that town shall settle hence,_  
_Hell, rising from a thousand thrones,_  
_Shall do it reverence."*_  
  
"I will kill him, brother," she clarified, "I will deliver his head to our sister on a silver platter and I put his heart on display next to the royal gems! It will be so, so lovely, brother~ especially seeing the White Rabbit crying like a little bitch when he's made to watch his lover die!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *The poem read by Hungary is not "original". Or, should I say, it's a poem called "The City in the Sea" by Edgar Allan Poe
> 
> Natalya/Belarus as The Queen of Hearts  
> Daisy/Nyo Italy as The Mouse  
> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit  
> Aden/Kugelmugel as The Eaglet  
> Vash/Switzerland as The Duck  
> Elizabeta/Hungary as TheLory  
> Roderich/Austria as The Dodo  
> Toris/Lithuania as The Frog servant  
> Yao/China as a Courtier in the Red Queen's Court  
> Ivan/Russia as The King of Hearts


	4. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice meets Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, while the White Rabbit faces the wrath of the Queen of Hearts.

"Wow, look at this bastard."  
  
"Ve~ fratello, do you think he's alright? Should we call someone?"   
  
"Who the fuck would we call?! No one's here!"   
  
"W-W-Well...we could...we could call Lud-?"   
  
"HELL TO THE FUCK NO, STUPID BASTARD!"   
  
"Th-Then what about Anto-?"   
  
"No. Definitely not."   
  
"Shhhh… keep it down," I mumbled, rubbing my sleepy eyes and tasting morning in my mouth, "Five… five more minutes..."   
  
There was a scoff from somewhere above me. "You're lucky we're even here, you bastard," the gruff voice said, although it was high in pitch and had the potential to sound very soothing and feminine.

"We’re making sure you don't get raped,” said another voice with a cheery tone that did _not_ fit the seriousness of such a statement.

 _"What?!"_ I yelped, surging into a sitting position. I looked around, seeing I was sitting up on a patch of soft grass in the middle of a forest.

Before me were two guys, looking almost exactly the same dressed in tight red shorts that barely covered their asses, brown suspenders, brown lace up boots and yellow shirts with bishop sleeves and a black ribbon holding the collar shut. They even look the same, only the one on my left was paler, had half lidded amber eyes and reddish hair while the one on my right had brunette hair, hazel eyes that looked more brown then hazel and his skin was a healthy olive color. 

The one on the right definitely scared me.   
  
"W-Wait, what do you mean _'rape'?!"_ _  
_   
The one on the right rolled his eyes, hands on hips. "There are some perverts in this world that would just _love_ to sink their teeth in a young, pretty boy in a dress."   
  
_In... a..._ I looked down to see my current state. My shirt and stockings were long gone, as well as my underwear. What replaced them were thigh high, white, silk stockings with lace at the top, black ankle strap shoes, undergarments made out of what felt like silk and lace and a lavender dress with puffed sleeves, a skirt that barely went past my thighs, a white petticoat beneath and a small apron -with pockets -over the skirt and was actually longer than the skirt by about half an inch.   
  
"W-Why am I in a dress?!" I squeaked, jumping to my feet and pulling down the skirt, trying to cover up my legs.

“What’s so wrong about wearing a dress?” the angry one asked with a sniff of derision, “My brother and I wore dresses all the time as children!”

“I-I was just… it's just… I didn't put it on…!” I stammered, nervous around this guy’s passionate and quick to ignite personality.

"Ve~ it was probably Gilbert."

"Gilbert? You... you call him Gilbert too?" I questioned, for some reason I felt hurt. I wanted to be the only one that called Gilbert by his name. _Everyone else should just call him "White Rabbit"..._ _  
_   
"Sì, he's like family so I call him Gilbert."   
  
"I just call him ‘bastard’."   
  
"Fratello, that's not very nice."   
  
"Does it look like I care?"   
  
"Ve~ well-."   
  
"U-Um...ex-excuse me, where am I? How did I get here? Who are you?" I said quickly, not liking the way my jealousy had calmed when happy twin spoke of Gilbert being like family, not a lover.   
  
"You're in the Forest of Five and Gilby probably brought you here to see us. And to take a siesta," Feliciano said with a giggle.   
  
"As for who we are, I am Tweedle Dee" -the angry one said pointing to himself -"but you can call me Lovino or whatever and this idiot is Tweedle Dum, you can call him Feliciano, I guess."   
  
"...Hey, wait, I'm not Tweedle Dum, you are fratello!"   
  
"Sì, yes you are, idiot."   
  
"No-."   
  
"Sì, _you are!"_ _  
_   
_"Ve~!"_ _  
_   
"U-Um… how… how do I get out of here?" I asked, interrupting their little argument.   
  
"You have to listen to our stories first!" Feliciano exclaimed excitedly, clapping his hands, "We have two!"   
  
"Just listen, you bastard, and we'll help you get out of here," Lovino huffed, hands on his hips.   
  
"Al-Alright..." I agreed; after all, what is the worst thing that could happen?   
  
"Fratello, do you want to tell the story together?" Tweedle Dum, Feliciano, asked, turning to look at his twin.   
  
"Sì, but I'll start-."   
  
"Ve~ but, fratello, you always start!"   
  
" _Silenco!_ It's because I am oldest!"   
  
"By thirty minutes!"   
  
"Sì, and don't you fucking forget it!"   
  
"But-!"   
  
"There once lived two brats- I mean -boys," Lovino began.   
  
"By a field," Feliciano said, soon after, "Full of mice."   
  
"One was older and taller."   
  
"Quite thin with snow for hair."   
  
"'Albino boy blue'."   
  
"Who could play the flute."   
  
"And fucking violin."   
  
"The other."   
  
"Was younger."   
  
"Sky trapped in his eyes."   
  
"Followed 'Albino' -fucking -'Boy Blue'."   
  
"Like little sheep and Bo-Peep."   
  
"As close as two fuckers can be."   
  
"Strength became weakness."   
  
"Keys thrown away."   
  
"As cages were locked."   
  
"Cut up and diced."   
  
"Put together again."   
  
"Chemicals injected."   
  
"Screaming was heard."   
  
"From 'Albino boy blue' above all others."   
  
"Revealed too soon."   
  
"Reborn anew -like a fucking butterfly."   
  
"Bones made to shift."   
  
"And creak."   
  
"Scars meant to mar."   
  
"Eternal crappy servitude."   
  
"Brother led astray."   
  
"By the amber eyes of a temptress," Lovino shot a dark look at his twin.   
  
"Eternal loneliness may be a blessing," Feliciano continued, ignoring the look.   
  
"Until."   
  
"One day."   
  
"A prince he did see... with a fine _boot-tay."_ _  
_   
"All satin and jewels," Tweedle Dum said, slapping his brother's arm.   
  
"Ow-! No room for a servant."   
  
"A slave."   
  
"Who is poorer than he."   
  
"They smiled and laughed."   
  
"Fell in love fast."   
  
"Until the Queen found out."   
  
"And ripped the motherfucking prince's heart out."   
  
"The screaming was loud."   
  
"As was the damn begging."   
  
"Yet she wrapped up the heart."   
  
"And sent it fucking flying."   
  
My head swam with questions, my heart drowning in sympathy and sadness. This only brought more questions to light. What happened to the White Rabbit's lover? Why couldn't the White Rabbit stop being the Queen's servant? Why was this Queen so cruel? Why did this story sound so familiar? Why couldn't I stop the sadness from forming in my stomach and leaking out in tears down my cheeks?   
  
"Ve~? Matthew, are you crying? Don't cry, it'll be ok! The Queen of Hearts can't hurt you!" Feliciano said, flapping his arms desperately. He knelt down and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into a hug, "We'll protect you, we're your friends even though Lovi-."   
  
"Chigi! Don't call me that!"   
  
"Even though Tweedle Dee swears a whole bunch, he really does like you! You're his best friend! Antonio doesn't count, since they're fucking~."   
  
_"Felciano!"_ Lovino and I yelled at the same time, blushing bright red and horrified that such a dirty thing came out of such a sweet boy's mouth.   
  
"VE~! W-W-W-What?! I'm sorry! I SURRENDER!" Feliciano screamed, pulling away to wave his arms desperately in the air, futilely fighting a non-existent enemy.   
  
I sighed. This was so strange. These people were strange, this place was strange, I didn't know where I was, everyone knew stuff I didn't. It was all very tiresome and irritating to say the least. "I think I'm going to go to take another nap..." I mumbled.   
  
"What? No, you fucking maple bastardo, we have another story to fucking tell you!" Tweedle Dee shouted, crossing his arms, "You better fucking listen, too, because this is fucking important!"   
  
"...really?"   
  
"Ve~ sì!"   
  
_"...really..."_ _  
_   
"Silencio, bastardo, and let my fratello start the stupid story."   
  
Feliciano cleared his throat, straightened his spine and his shirt, as he stretched out his suspenders with a smug look. Taking a deep breath, he began, "The Queen of Hearts is a tyrant."   
  
"The worst of the worst," Lovino continued.   
  
"Steps on our windpipes."   
  
"If we dare speak against her."   
  
"Trials are rigged."   
  
"Even the king lives in fear."   
  
"She will rip out your heart and eat it at supper."   
  
"Heads."   
  
"Centerpieces."   
  
"In her castle."   
  
"What the Alice must do."   
  
"Is really quite simple."   
  
"He must distinguish the truth."   
  
"From the lies."   
  
"From the fiction."   
  
"Remember the future."   
  
"His past."   
  
"What exists in the present."   
  
"Go back to the beginning."   
  
"Then into the past."   
  
"Drink every last drop."   
  
"From the 'Drink Me' cans."   
  
"He must remember the story."   
  
"The how."   
  
"And the why."   
  
"End to end."   
  
"Back to back."   
  
"Pain to pleasure."   
  
"Once again."   
  
"He must take up a sword."   
  
"Stab his own heart."   
  
"Cut off his own head."   
  
"Blood on the floor."   
  
"The king's chains."   
  
"He will raise."   
  
"The Queen will be broken."   
  
"Her kingdom will fall."   
  
"And Wonderland will be free for all."   
  
"Alice will save, it will be the Queen of Heart's fateful day," the twins said together, bowing at the waist at the same time.   
  
All was quiet except for the animal noises in the forest. An animal's scream, an owl's "who, who", the rustling of leaves and bushes, a bird's call. I couldn't speak, I was so shocked.   
  
"...who's...who's the Alice?" Who was that speaking? Oh...it was me wasn't it? My usually quiet voice was like a whisper on the wind, broken and strangled. It was pathetic, sad, lonely. _Scared. I'm...I'm scared..._ _  
_   
"You," Feliciano said, his voice quiet and gentle.   
  
"You're the Alice, moron," Lovino huffed, "but try not to worry too much or whatever. We'll… do something… right, fratello?"   
  
"Sì~!"   
  
"...Th...Thank you..." I said, still shocked and confused but feeling oddly grateful. They were so kind, even if Lovino was a little stand offish. I knew, deep in my heart and my soul that I could trust them. That I would need them.   
  
"Nessun problema, amico~!" Feliciano cheered, jumping up and down and clapping, "Come on now, we have to go!"   
  
"W-Where?" I asked hesitantly, everywhere I had been in Wonderland _-the Dodo had called it Wonderland, I think-_ had been pretty weird. I looked around me now, noticing the unrealistic softness of the grass that was a blue-ish green, the green leaves that were the color of mint with bright blue veins and the bark of the trees was both dark and light brown, making it look like the tree trunks had stripes. _Weird… definitely weird..._ _  
_   
"To the White Rabbit's house, of course~!"   
  
My head jerked up and I blushed. _The White Rabbit… Gilbert… his house… Gilbert..._ Excitement was an embarrassing bumble in my chest and I couldn't help but to smile. _I'm going to see Gilbert again!_ _  
_   
"Hurry up, we don't have all damn day!" Tweedle Dee snapped as Feliciano began to skip through the trees. He turned his back to me and began running after his twin.   
  
"Wa-Wait!" I squeaked, scrambling to my feet and running after them, "Hold on!" I ran into the forest, running faster and faster and trying to catch up to them. I really, really wanted to see Gilbert again, for some reason.   
  
It was more than how… _attractive_ he was, although that was certainly part of it. Gilbert felt so familiar to me, I felt like he was someone that I needed and wanted with an immeasurable amount of passion and desire. And I did, currently, but I felt like it was something I had felt a while ago. Sometime in the past. Sometime in the past I had wanted him and, maybe… maybe he wanted me, too. I hoped so. If he didn't return at least some of my feelings then… then I would curl up in a dark pit and cry in the fetal position!   
  
...pretty sad, I know, but that's all I got at the moment.   
  
Gilbert was kind.   
Gilbert was gentle.   
Gilbert was smart.   
Gilbert was special.   
Gilbert was beautiful.   
Gilbert was strong.   
Gilbert was...a tortured knight, hiding his battle scars beneath his shining armor. Shining armor that was no longer silver, but stained red from all the blood he had spilled and drawn in battle.   
  
_Gilbert...Gilbert was mine!_ _  
_   
_...Whoa! Possessive much, self?!_ _  
_   
"Ve~ hurry up, Matthew!"   
  
"Hurry up, shit head!"   
  
"Don't you wanna see Gilby~?"   
  
"We don't got all day, bastard!"   
  
I stumbled out of the forest, breaking through the line of trees to see I was alone. The twins were gone. Vanished into thin air. But, what I did see, was a beautiful, glittering, coral colored pathway leading to a small, cottage like house. It was built in the traditional English style with a thatched roof, white walls and everything, the front door a bright red, the windows on both the top floor and ground floor containing purple and blue cornflowers and a garden was visible in the back of the house, surrounded and protected by a white fence. It struck a cord in me, this cottage was so deeply familiar that I was awestruck by its picturesque beauty and the homey, nostalgic feeling that accompanied it.   
  
Slowly, I walked up to the cozy cottage, walking up the two short, stone steps that led to the front door. I placed my hand on the cold, smooth, brass door knob.   
  
...and it swung open. 

* * *

Gilbert's hands were chained to the stone wall, spread out at his sides and his torso bare. Bare except for the blood, bruises, sweat and lacerations littering his body. His legs had given out a while ago, the only thing keeping him up now were the chains, and he could barely keep his eyes open as his body shook. He felt his rabbit ears twitching at the painful stimulation, attempting to pick up sounds that would help him come out alive, blood trickling down his back and matting the hair of his rabbit tail. Weakly, Gilbert tilted his head up to get a brief look at his tormentor, his torturer, his master, his King.  
  
King Ivan raised his arm, lifting the bloodied pipe over his head.   
  
_It was not his fault,_ Gilbert thought, trying to remind himself, convince himself, _It's hers. That spiteful little bitch._ _  
_   
The King was not himself, he never was when these things happened, the Queen of Hearts made sure of it. Ivan's purple-ish eyes were black, blank and manic, a wide smile permanently on his face, the corners stretching all the way up to the top of his ears. He wore loose trousers, brown knee high boots, his signature scarf and a crimson shirt with the sleeves rolled up.   
  
Just as he was about to bring down the pipe for… Gilbert had lost count but you get the picture, a voice spoke out from the darkness. "That's enough, my love." The Queen of Hearts appeared from the shadows, her heels clicking against the blood and spit covered stone floor. "White Rabbit," Natalya said coldly, "Have you learned your lesson?"   
  
Gilbert spit blood and mucus from his mouth and onto the floor in front of the Queen. "Ja, your Majesty."   
  
"Dobra. Now tell me where your lover is."   
  
A smirk spread across his face. _Ah, so that is why I'm being punished._ "I don't know." _I can hold out for Matthew. My love, hold on a while longer… hopefully Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum got to you in time… we will see each other soon, I know it._ _  
_   
Natalia scowled. She hated his face, hated his voice. Hated him, hated him, _hated him,_ but -sadly -she needed him to take down her sister and gain control of all of Wonderland. "Wipe that smirk from your face, slave!" she screeched, "Or off with your head!"   
  
Abruptly his smile left, amusement still obvious in his voice as he said, "Ja, meine Königin."   
  
She made a disgusted noise in the back of her throat as she motioned for two guards to unlock Gilbert's chains. "Drag your corpse back to your room," Natalia ordered, spinning on her heel, "And get the King to his!" She snapped her fingers and Ivan, along with the pipe, fell to the ground in a heap.   
  
The spell that controlled Ivan was broken. For now.   
  
But Gilbert… Gilbert was still a slave, even if his chains had been taken off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit  
> Natalya/Belarus as The Red Queen/The Queen of Hearts  
> Ivan/Russia as The Red King/The King of Hearts  
> Lovino/South Italy as Tweedle Dee  
> Felciano/North Italy as Tweedle Dum


	5. The Rabbit Sends a Little Bill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice eats something he shouldn't and there's some badly described erotic dancing on the author's part

"The Rodent said I should be expecting a guest," a guy -I assumed he was a guy- said with a bright smile as he opened the door, "I never expected it to be, like, a cutie, though. BTW, I LOVE that dress! Where'd you get it?!"  
  
"U-Uh… I kinda… woke up with it on?" I said uncertainly, "Erm, who are you?"   
  
"Ah, that does totally seem like the Rodent's style," the blonde muttered, looking me up and down, "Oh, and I'm Feliks, by the by. I, like, work here. As a maid and gardener and whatever, but you can totes come in~!"   
  
"Um, th-thank you… Feliks..." I said quietly, and quickly stepping inside.   
  
It was warm and cozy inside and I smiled. The walls and floors were real wood that had the entire house smelling rich and like a forest. There was a living room, kitchen and dining room with a staircase on the right wall with a door on the very back wall that led to the garden. The living room, to the right, held a black comfortable looking couch, a glass coffee table, a white shag carpet, two black high backed chairs, a red and brown stone fire place and pictures on the mantle. To the left was the kitchen with dark oak cabinets, black counter tops and modern looking appliances and, in the dining room, was a simple rectangular, dark wood table with matching chairs. Lighting up the three spaces was a large black chandelier in the middle of the room. It was warm, cozy and beautiful.   
  
"The Rabbit totally designed this himself. It was, like, meant for him and his brother but I take it that the twins totally explained their falling out?"   
  
I nodded.   
  
"Good. I can't explain heavy stuff. _Totally_ not my forte."   
  
"It-It's ok," I stammered, following him into the kitchen, "Is… Is Gil home?"   
  
A weird, kind of creepy, smile stretched across his face and he opened the door to the ice box, pulling out some blue whip cream, a mixing bowl and a small basket of purple berries. "Nie, he isn't," Feliks said, pulling a small, ceramic bowl from one of the higher cabinets, "He should be back soon, though. I think. Maybe."   
  
I sighed quietly, leaning against the counter and looking at the guy. In a dress. _Wait, he was in a dress too?!_ He was dressed in what resembled a uniform, probably a maid uniform of some kind. His dress was a brown dress with Juliet sleeves that went down to his knees with a swooping neckline and a white petticoat beneath, black fishnet tights, black shoes with a one inch heel, a white pinafore over his brown dress and a crochet maid cap. He made it look good and, despite his lack of breasts, it looked like he was meant to wear a dress, that it was simply the natural thing to wear.   
  
"N-Nice uniform," I tried to compliment, watching as he scooped what appeared to be lemon pudding into the two matching, ceramic bowls.   
  
"Thank you~" Feliks giggled, slicing up some purple-berries with a knife, he cut off the long, spiky steam before cutting the berry in half, "It's not, like, as cute or awesome as my other dresses but, it'll due. You know, for work and stuff."   
  
_Other dresses?_ I was suddenly reminded of the dream that felt more like a forgotten memory that I had when I was drowning in my own tears. If it really was a memory, or some vision of this world I had fallen into, then it really wasn't so strange to wear dresses. Yeah, from the information the vision had implanted, it was fine for men to wear dresses, although it was uncommon after a certain age. _There is more that I know that I have to remember,_ I realized, _it’s important. I have to remember it to stay alive. And to fill in all the empty spaces that had existed in me since god knew when._

 I nodded, watching silently as he put the purple-berry slices in the bowls with the pudding. "When did you say Gil will be home?"  
  
Feliks smiled that creepy smile again, using a spoon to scoop the home made whip cream into the bowls, on top of the pudding and purple-berries. _"Soon~"_ he hummed, still smiling. He picked up the two bowls and placed them on the table, "Come on, we gotta eat!"   
  
I joined him at the table, thinking about how strange it was that I was eating dessert with a stranger in a house I've never seen, bet felt oddly familiar. Definitely the weirdest day of my life… wait… have I been here for a day? Or longer? "How long have I been here...?" I wondered, accidentally speaking out loud.   
  
"Well...you totally made it through the night, you know, _unraped."_   
  
So one night and -basically -a day. _Awesome...just awesome..._ I sighed, grabbing the silver spoon and scoop the dessert into my mouth. The lemon pudding was super tangy -in a good way- and the purple berries were super sweet and the whip cream -although it was a weird color -helped to balance the two extreme flavors out. I liked it, honestly I did, and as soon as I swallowed I scooped up even more and placed it in my mouth. It was good. Really, _really_ good and it made my stomach feel nice and full and fuzzy.   
  
"You like it?" Feliks asked, hopeful and preppy.   
  
"Do I like it? I love it!" I gushed, swallowing what was in my mouth and licking the leftovers from the corner of my mouth and my bottom lip, "What is this? It's awesome! Can I have more? Oh… wait… that's rude… How is it so good? My stomach feels weird!"   
  
"I -wait… what?"   
  
"My. Stomach. Feels. Funny," I said slowly, trying to make him understand me. Why wasn't he understanding me? I wanted to see Gilbert's bedroom - _wait… one step at a time, me, baby steps… baby steps..._   
  
"Shit, shit, shit, shit!" he cursed, jumping away from the table, "FUCK! Just… J-Just stay here! I'll be back!" Feliks ran out the front door, yelling for someone named Carlos.   
  
"Wait! Feliks, what-?" my words died in my throat as I felt burning pain start in my stomach, rattling my teeth and making my bones crack. I screamed. _It hurt! It hurt! It hurt!_ I recognized the feeling, I had felt it before. In that room. But, that time, Gilbert -my White Rabbit -had been there to help me. His presence had calmed me but he was no longer here; he was off somewhere, living his life, doing his own thing, he had no time for me. But that really wasn't fair. He didn't know I was going to come to his house. Or did he? No. Probably not. Probably. Maybe. Probably. I shut my eyes and gritted my teeth. _Hopefully it'll stop... Please stop. Please stop. Please stop!_   
  
Soon enough, it did. After I heard crashing and popping seams, I opened my eyes and ended up slamming my head against the ceiling and banging my elbow against the wall. "Ow!" I yelped, trying to straighten my spine but I couldn't. My leg was through the front door, left arm through a window, my right arm tucked painfully between me and the wall, my other leg tucked beneath me with my knee sticking out the back door and the right side of my face pressed up against the window. "Jesus!"   
  
"S-See! Didn't I, like, tell you?!" I heard Feliks yell and I looked out of the window using my right eye. Feliks was pulling along a tanned, buff male with black dreadlocks, the man wore a dirtied orange shirt, brown-black boots and stained green denim pants. He carried a bucket, a chimney sweep and a mop, a rag over his shoulder and a confused look on his face.   
  
"What do you- Holy fucking shit!" the tan man yelled, "Feliks, what the hell is this?!"   
  
"IT WAS A GODDAMN ACCIDENT, CARLOS!" Feliks shouted, stomping his heeled foot in irritation, "NOW GO GET HIM!"   
  
_Carlos...? Carlos...?_ Why does that name sound familiar? MAPLE! _Wait, that's a fucking pussy way to curse..._   
  
"M-Matthew?" Carlos spoke, looking up at my giant form in shock, "Ma-Matthew, what are you...? We thought you were dead!"   
  
_We? Who's "we"? Why do you know me?!_ I wondered before everything went black.

* * *

_ Flashback:  _

> The White Rabbit had shown up at the palace and I felt my heart begin to hammer painfully against my ribs.
> 
> This was our second meeting but I considered it our first. We didn't really talk at the ball but we… w-we _danced_ . We danced all night long and it felt amazing, perfect, _right._ It was one of my servants, so darling and adorable and sweet with blonde hair and green eyes, that told me of his arrival.   
>    
>  "Are… Are you s-sure, Noah?!" I demanded, my voice cracking as I turned to face him. I had been sitting at my vanity table, brushing my hair, when Noah had told me the news. I wasn't even dressed yet! Well, I had a white, silk robe on but that was it.   
>    
>  "Yes, my lord," Noah said with a mischievous smile as he bowed slightly, "He's in the thrown room with your parents, requesting that you grace him with your presence."   
>    
>  "M-M-Me?!" I asked, incredulous.   
>    
>  "Of course you, my lord!" he exclaimed, grabbing my wrist and gently tugging me to my feet, "Hurry! Go get ready, he's so handsome, my lord!"   
>    
>  In ten minutes, I was dressed with Noah and two other servant's assistance. I put on a blue dress that went down to my knees and hugged my sides, the dress was a pale blue with navy blue embroidery on the hem of the skirt with cold shoulder styled sleeves, I had on my family ring and a simple, silver, chain charm bracelet with gloss on my lips, silver studs in the shells of my ears and white, lace up, leather boots that went up to my thigh with a two and a half inch heel. After getting a thumbs up from Noah, I sprinted down the hallway and slid down the grand staircase's railing, dropping gracelessly to my feet and quickly walking to my parents' throne room, trying to calm myself and regain my breath. I didn't want him to know I had been running. I took a deep, calming breath before approaching the guards at the big, double doors and smiling at them, "Good afternoon, gentlemen. I believe my presence has been requested?"   
>    
>  The guards smiled, blushing. I always made sure to treat the people in the palace with respect, rather they be personal servants, guards, gardeners, maids, butlers, cooks or stable boys; they were still people and I wanted to make sure they knew that I appreciated all they did for my family, their job wasn't easy. Frankly, they did all the stuff that my family could do by themselves, but didn't because royalty just… _didn't_ . "Hello, my lord," they said, bowing, "Yes they did, would you like to go inside?"   
>    
>  "Yes, please."   
>    
>  They smiled again and opened the doors to let me inside. "Merci," I hummed and their smiles broadened. I stepped inside, striding forward as the guards closed the doors behind me. Inside, just like Noah said, were my parents sitting in their respective thrones with Gilbert standing in front of them. He wore a different outfit than the one he wore at the ball; this time he wore a gold coat with wizard sleeves and black on the collar and on the cuffs of the coat, brown trousers tucked into the same boots he had worn at the party and a crimson shirt that was unbuttoned down to the bottom of his ribcage to reveal the strong muscles of his chest and his sternum.   
>    
>  He. Looked. _Delicious_.
> 
> "Hello, Matthew, dear," the Queen said with a kind smile, "We have a guest, you remember the White Rabbit, don't you?"   
>    
>  "O-Oui! I m-mean, of course I do," I stammered, blushing bright red and bowing, "It's a pleasure to see you again, White Rabbit."   
>    
>  _"Gilbert,"_ he said with his raspy, accented voice, that voice sent shivers down my spine and I subconsciously licked my lips. He was just so _enticing!_ "Please, call me Gilbert."
> 
> "Katyusha, my dear, should we-?" my father began to ask but was cut off by a small shake of my mother's head. 
> 
> "Matthew, my child, we must ask you to entertain the White Rabbit for a few moments."   
>    
>  "Would you mind taking the White Rabbit on a tour?" the King asked, sharing a look with his wife, "Your mother and I need to discuss some business..."   
>    
>  "Yes, I'd be honored," I breathed, my heart beating incredibly fast as my face turned pink, "J-Just follow me, Whi- um, Gilbert."   
>    
>  The albino grinned at me, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he followed me out of the throne room. "It was nice of you to give me a tour," Gilbert said as I slowed down my stride so we could walk side by side… as equals, "But, you don't have to. If you don't want-."   
>    
>  "N-Non!" I exclaimed, gaping slightly, "Of course I want to, I don't mind at all!" We fell silent after that, but it wasn't awkward. "So… where would you like to see first? Would you like to see the gardens?"   
>    
>  "I would like that."   
>    
>  I smiled shyly, stepping closer to the albino. Our hands brushed and I blushed, wanting to reach out for his hand but refraining; I didn't want to suddenly come on too strong or scare him off. _I really, really like Gilbert._   
>    
>  "My lord prince!"   
>    
>  Gilbert and I stopped, looking around for the voice.   
>    
>  "Up here, my lord!"   
>    
>  I tilted my head, looking up. I smiled when I saw it was Carlos, the head of maintenance and a close friend of mine. "Carlos!" I exclaimed with a toothy smile, "What are you doing hanging from the ceiling?" Although Carlos had a muscular, fleshy lizard tail and tan, olive colored scales instead of tan skin, I couldn't figure out why he was hanging from the beams on the ceiling by his tail.   
>    
>  He grinned down at me. "I'm cleaning the chandeliers," Carlos explained, "Who is your friend, my lord?"   
>    
>  I blushed. _Friend!_ My Friend! "Thi-This is the White Rabbit," I stammered, "We met at my birthday party."   
>    
>  "Did you now?"   
>    
>  "Ja," Gilbert confirmed with a sharp nod and a weary look up at the tanned man hanging from the rafters.   
>    
>  "We were going to the gardens."   
>    
>  "Be on your way then, my lord prince," Carlos said with an awkward looking bow, "We will talk later." He winked, smirking and gesturing suggestively at Gilbert. I blushed bright red, glad that the albino's attention was on a painting, and stuck my tongue out at Carlos.   
>    
>  He laughed, righting himself to stand on a beam and walking out of the hall. "Should we get going?" I asked, turning my attention to Gilbert again, "It's right here."   
>    
>  "Ja, that sounds good."   
>    
>  The sun was shining in the garden as we stepped out onto the glowing, rainbow stone path. The flowers surrounded the path, ranging from ankle height in muted pastels to eight foot tall flowers that glowed beneath black light. We walked along the path for a minute, comfortably silent.   
>    
>  "If you don't mind my asking," I finally said, although my voice remained soft and light, "what was your business with my parents?"   
>    
>  "I was delivering a message from the Queen und King of Hearts," he answered simply, stepping closer so our shoulders painlessly bumped into each other.   
>    
>  "Ah." It was quiet for a while long before I hesitantly broke it again, blushing as I did, "S-So… why di-did you request me-e?"   
>    
>  Gilbert smirked at my question, wrapping his hand around my slim wrist and pulling me to a stop. "I have to have a reason?" he teased, slowly pulling me towards his body. I gasped quietly, feeling his body heat, and I wanted to lean into him. He was broad, warm and comforting. "Well… if you must know..." he continued, lifting my hand to his lips, he turned it over so my palm was facing up, and kissed my pulse, "I really wanted to see you again."   
>    
>  My heart stopped. I swear, at that moment, I died and went to Heaven for a moment. "I-I-I," I stammered as he took my arms, picking them up and wrapping them around his neck. He pulled our bodies flush together, embracing me gently. "I really wanted to see you too, Gil." 

* * *

I woke up to pulling on my hair and a stinging pain in my arms and legs.

"MONSTER!"   
  
"GET IT OUT!"   
  
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!"   
  
"IS IT GOING TO EAT US?!"   
  
A stinging pain formed in between my eyes and I looked down, seeing rocks lying on the floor from where they had fallen after being thrown. "C-Carlos?" I whimpered, struggling to look around for the tan, lizard humanoid man.   
  
"I'm right here, Matthew," he said, appearing on my shoulder. He looked out the window at the angry mob and frowned. "I didn't want to do this but… drink this." He handed me a small, amber bottle. "Drink it," Carlos repeated, uncorking it and placing it on my over sized lips. He poured it on my tongue and I swallowed.   
  
It hurt, as expected but I grit my teeth and tried not to scream out in pain as my bones shifted and I shrank, shrank and shrank until I was the size of a field mouse. The ground was shaking and I nervously looked out of a crack in the door to see men in blood red armor walking towards us. "Carlos!" I squeaked, my entire body shaking at the sight of the _giant_ -height wise -army.   
  
"I will handle it, Matthew, just run!" Carlos yelled, _"Run!"_   
  
My body twitched, jerking forward as I ran out of a crack in the doorway, avoiding being stepped on and disappearing in the tall, dark grass. 

* * *

The ballroom had red wallpaper with a gold heart pattern, black drapes pulled away from the high arched windows, showing off the Full orange moon and the swirling green, orange and white of the cosmos, the floor was solid gold with a black carpet leading up to the dais in the ballroom that held the King and Queen's thrones. Pressed up against the right wall was a small stage where the Mock Turtle and the Gryphon, as well as a number of other creatures, played instruments for the party goers to dance to and, next to that, was another stage that was currently empty and, against the left wall, was a buffet table covered with a red table cloth.

People were dressed in rich fabrics, Natalya dressed the best out of them all in a glittering gold, strapless dress, five inch black heels, black gloves, her hair in an intricate bun on the left side of her head and her gold and red ruby crown heavy on her head, diamonds weighing down her earlobes and rings, and bracelets, glittering on her fingers and wrists. Ivan was dressed in his simple, black military uniform, medals over his left lung, a red cape draped over his right shoulder, black leather gloves, black boots and a more modest silver and red ruby crown. Natalya looked smug, excited, while Ivan just looked tired and worn.   
  
Gilbert was sitting next to Natalya's throne, pissed but staying quiet. He was wearing leather pants made up entirely of buckles and straps, no shoes, a red ball gag shoved in his mouth with saliva sticking to the corners of his lips, a black leather vest with only a thick strap around his neck and around his lower back, showing off his shoulder blades and the middle of his back which was covered in bleeding lacerations. Oh, yeah, there was also a black, leather collar around his neck, and the chain attached to the collar was being held tightly in Natalya's fist.   
  
"How does it feel Rabbit?" she giggled evilly, "Being reduced to a slave? A pet?"   
  
He remained silent.   
  
"Oh, right, you can't talk~."   
  
He really wanted to kill her but he fisted his hands, stopping himself. Gilbert was under her control.   
  
The music began to change and the previously empty stage was beginning to fill. It consisted of Yao and other members of his family dressed in simple black robes that dragged along the floor. They lined up on the stage, Yao in front and two of his family members on either side and one step behind him. They began to sway, pulling at the sash of their robes, rolling their shoulders and letting the fabric fall around their feet. There were two other men with Yao, all of them wearing black fabric around their hips with a golden trim and rubies dangling from the hem, golden body paint made stripes on thighs, arms, chests, abdomens and shoulders and rubies decorated their bodies, around their navels and on the top of their hands and feet; there were also two women with Yao, who wore fabric around their hips that matched the men's but a bra like top covered their breasts, the top was black with red rubies and gold coins hanging from the hem, they also had golden body paint and red rubies on their bodies like the males of the family.   
  
Yao was the oldest and he had four siblings, only three of which were up on stage with him. On stage it was Yao, the third oldest named Im Young Soo, the fourth born named Mei and the youngest of the siblings named Li Xiao. The other woman, Lein, was a little younger than Yao and was married to Yao's sister, Mei, but was really close to her wife's family.

"You were so young  
And I guess I'm old"

Yao was the one that opened his mouth and began singing. Yao placed one of his hands on his stomach, rolling his body forward, while his family began to erotically move their hips to the beat.

"Open your eyes  
I'll keep mine closed"

Yao placed his hands over his eyes while his family began to temptingly undulate their entire bodies.

"I prefer standing  
And you take your seat"

Yao's family dropped to the floor and began to twist and contort with frightening skill and flexibility.

  
"I'll be wide awake   
And you'll fall asleep"

Yao raised his arms above his head before falling backwards, his family raised themselves on one knee just in time to place their hands on his back, easing him down onto the ground.

"And you'll fall down a hole  
That's the one place we both know   
You take me with you if you could, but I wouldn't go"

Yao's family kept their hands on his torso as he twisted and writhed in a suggestive fashion.

  
"I guess that sometimes we both lose our minds   
To find a better road"

 Yao's family left Yao and slinked to the right of the stage, turning their backs to him.

"I can be pensive  
You can be so sure"

Yao got onto his knees and began to rock his hips to the music as his youngest sibling, Li Xiao, walked over. He stood behind Yao, grabbing the older male's left arm and twisting it behind his back. A small flinch from Yao was the only subtle sign that the movement had hurt.

"You'll be the poison  
You'll be the cure"

Im Young Soo walked over, twisting Yao's other arm just as Li Xiao had done. Yao scowled slightly this time, just as his brothers bent his torso forward, Yao's pony tail swinging around over his shoulder.

"I'm alone on the journey  
I'm alive nonetheless"

Mei came over this time, fisting her hand in Yao's hair and tugging his head upwards so his face was level and looking at the awed crowd.

"And when you do your very worst"

 Lein came over, grabbing Yao by the throat and helping the others tug the older male to his feet.

"Mmmmm it feels the best"

Yao bit his lip and lowered his eyelids as he rocked his hips forward, as if he was begging to be fucked, making the crowd -both men and women -cat call.

"And you'll fall down a hole  
That's the one place we both know   
You take me with you if you could, but I wouldn't go"

Yao's siblings let him go, spinning away from him. They stood in the background, wrapping their arms around each other's waists, swaying their hips and rocking them into the air.

"I guess sometimes we both lose our minds  
To find a better road"

Yao's eyes glanced to the side before returning to the crowd, bending his knees and spreading his legs, provocatively rolling his hips and body in the direction of the crowd. The albino's eyes followed Yao's gaze, finding that they had gone in the direction of the King of Hearts. He watched as Ivan's hands clenched the arms of this throne, looking at the dancer with a face that was light pink and dark, hungry eyes. Hungry eyes that were also sad and desperate. _They're in love,_ Gilbert realized, shocked, _they're in love but they can't be together because..._ His thought trailed off as he glared at Natalya from the corner of his eyes.

"And you'll fall down a hole  
That's the one place in this world that we both know"

 Yao stood up as the others got down on all fours, crawling towards him. 

"You take me with you if you could  
But if you could I'd lose everything"

 The others gathered around Yao's legs, hands reaching up and running down his sides, abdomen and legs, his body paint smearing.

"Can't you see the faces melting as the sun rains from their eyes"

 Yao's family turned around, backs against Yao's body and slowly dragged themselves up, standing and backs pressed against Yao's body.

"Who are you to keep your head with the hearts that you hang behind"

The others scurried, standing in a single file line behind Yao.

"Look at yourself, look in the mirror, don't you see a lie?  
That you tell yourself again a thousand times"

 Yao spread his arms out at his sides, the others behind him doing the same and rocking to the beat, which had gotten faster, louder, more violent.

"And the truth that makes us laugh will make you cry" 

He looked directly at Natalya as he sang, his family -who had lined up in order of age -placed their hands on the shoulders of whoever was in front of them. Lein, who was behind Yao, placed her hands on the older male's shoulders and pushed him down onto his knees.

"You wanna die? No?" 

Yao's family suddenly dropped, falling onto their sides on the ground. They clutched their throats, rolling onto their stomachs and trying to crawl towards the edge of the stage, movements that were made strangely sexual and provocative, only to fall limp on the ground. Their arms were stretched out, legs bent, as if they had died in a vain attempt to escape their fate. The crowd gasped.

"So you fall down a hole  
That's the one place where we both know"

Yao rose to his feet, hands clenched in front of his heart, his voice heart breakingly sad.

"You take me with you if you could, but I wouldn't go"

He looked back at his family, motioning to their still bodies with his arm and squeezing his eyes shut, as if in pain.

"Because sometimes we both lose our minds"

Yao turned back to the crowd, hands clutched in front of his stomach, strands of hair sticking to his forehead, neck and cheeks. It was due to sweat but it looked like it was due to tears.

"To find a better road"

  
His voice faded out as he bowed his head, the crowd waiting until the music finished. When it finally did, they erupted into manic applause and Yao raised his head, smiling shyly. The other members of his family followed suit, raising themselves off the ground -smiling -and lining up, grabbing each other's hands and bowing to the crowd. Laughing, they wrapped themselves in their robes and left the stage, leaving out a side door to go to their dressing room.   
  
"Did you enjoy it, big brother?" Natalya asked, her voice slightly accusing.   
  
"It was fantastically performed," he said, voice calm, not hinting at any emotion what so ever, "If you don't mind, sister, I think it would only be appropriate if I go offer my compliments to the Wangs."   
  
"Go ahead," she scoffed slightly, put off as she rested her head on her hand, looking out at the crowd, "Do whatever you wish."   
  
"Thank you," Ivan said with a nod, he stood up and walked out of the side door. The albino noticed the hunger and sadness that was glowing in the King's eyes, pitying him. Gilbert knew those feelings well.   
  
"He's sleeping with him," Natalya muttered and the White Rabbit looked up at her, "but that's ok. He doesn't love that Oriental whore. He loves _me."_   
  
Gilbert gave her a doubtful look but didn't comment. After all, he still had a gag in his mouth.   
  
_Matthew… I won't be long. I promise, liebling._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *The song that Yao and crew danced to was "The Poison" by All American Rejects
> 
> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Carlos/Cuba as Bill the Lizard  
> Feliks/Poland as Pat (a random housekeeper in the book)  
> Noah/Nyo Liechtenstein as Matthew's servant  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit  
> Katyusha/Ukraine as the White Queen/Matthew's mother  
> Natalya/Belarus as The Red Queen/The Queen of Hearts  
> Ivan/Russia as The Red King/The King of Hearts  
> Yao/China as a courtier/dancer  
> Lien/Vietnam as a courtier/dancer  
> Li Xiao/Hong Kong as a courtier/dancer  
> Mei/Taiwan as a courtier/dancer  
> Im Young Soo/South Korea as a courtier/dancer


	6. Advice from a Caterpillar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice meets the Caterpillar. Oh, and there's some sexy times, too.

My feet, now small and tiny but proportionate to my body, carried me across through the grass and over the soil. I felt like a mouse, the kind that could sometimes be seen scurrying across the floor of my kitchen back home -or was it really home? Who knows? I was glad I didn't run into a any bugs, though, I didn't know rather or not they'd kill me or talk to me or… whatever. Grass slapped against my stocking covered legs and my bare arms, sometimes my face, but I didn't stop until I pushed past the grass and tripped into a clear patch of dirt. I whimpered pushing myself up on my hands and knees, looking around to see a caterpillar smoking a hookah on a giant hot pink and yellow freckled mushroom. "U-Um, excuse me?" I said, standing up and slowly making my way to the caterpillar despite my scraped knees, "You wouldn't happen to know where I am, would you?"  
  
The Caterpillar, who I realized was actually a man with spiky blonde hair, a scar running diagonally through his right eyebrow, a pair of copper colored, round glasses and amber-green eyes with six legs and feet. He sat on a tomato colored mushroom with magenta stripes, a hookah beside him, which he was smoking from; he pressed the metal end to his lips, inhaling and closing his eyes slightly at the deep inhale, before blowing it out in a long, thin, curling stream of neon green smoke. "Who. Are. _You?"_  
  
I frowned, "I'm sorry, I should've introduced myself, I'm Matthew" -I bowed, though I couldn’t help but feel like the movement was awkward-"and who might you be?"  
  
"Who might I be...? That's an adorable question!" the Caterpillar said, inhaling more opium spoke and letting it out in fat, orange, oval streams; suddenly, he erupted into a fit of laughter, "Who might I be?! Who might _you_ be, darlin'?! Who _gives a shit?”_  
  
"I-I do!" I squeaked, face read in embarrassment, why was he laughing at me?  
  
"No… No you don't..." the Caterpillar said suddenly serious, he stared straight into my eyes, looking down into my soul -my true self -and judging it, "No you don't… no you don't… No you don't! NO YOU DON'T _, NO YOU DON'T!_ NO! YOU! _DON'T!"_  
  
"O-Oui! I do!" I insisted, my lip quivering as I flinched away from his screams and his yells, "I care! I swear by the god in this land, I swear it!"  
  
_“No, you don’t!”_  
  
"I swear it on my _life!”_  
  
_"You don’t even know who you are!"_ he spat, turning away from me in disgust as he angrily inhaled more of the opium smoke, "...you don't even care enough to introduce yourself using your proper _name..."_  
  
"I… I'm Matthew," I whimpered, curling into myself and staring at my dirt covered shoes, "Just Matthew-."  
  
"Not just Matthew, you nitwit," the Caterpillar snarled, blowing out his smoke, which was an angry red, _"Just Matthew!_ -do you even know who Matthew is?!"  
  
"Yes, I'm him!" I insisted, pressing a hand to my chest, feeling my heart beat erratically, "I'm-."  
  
"You're not Matthew," the drug smoking male snapped, "Matthew is regal, Matthew is the violent, the merciful, the powerful, the kind, the fair, the beautiful, the heir. You are not him! You are insignificant, you are impotent, merciless, weak, cold, inequitable, hideous, nothing. _You are the heir to nothing!_ You don't even deserve the dirty rabbit you've fuc-!"  
  
"Shut up, now, Caterpillar!" I shouted, hands curling into fists as I marched towards his mushroom, "Don't you dare speak down to me!"  
  
"What are you going to-?!" He cut himself off as I hauled myself up onto the top of the mushroom, glaring down at him. I grabbed the front of his jacket, pulled him off his ass and snarling in his face.  
  
"Just because I'm kind and fair, doesn't mean I will hesitate when I order your _imprisonment for treason,"_ I hissed threateningly, my knuckles white and my hand quivering. Here it was. The dark, vile side I tried to keep contained but seemed to come out in bursts despite how hard I tried. "I don't care what you think of me, but as soon as you bring my Gilbert into this, it becomes my business. Do we understand each other, Abel? I am your Prince, you are nothing but my tutor and an opium addicted Caterpillar!"

I didn't know where any of these words were coming from, they were spilling forth unchecked and unbidden; it was not a false command, I felt the rightness of it, but I couldn't pin point the truth in it. Couldn't pinpoint where the truth laid in the statement. Why was this truth? Why did I have the right to command this of him?

  
He just blinked at me, openly shocked and -maybe -a little amazed before a wide grin broke across his face. "Ha, you're remembering who Matthew is!" Abel cackled, throwing his head back as he broke out in manic laughter, "When you wake up, just remember: one side makes you shorter, one side makes you taller."  
  
_"What-?"_ I yelped as he wrapped an arm around my waist, tipping me backwards so my torso was hanging over the edge of the mushroom; leaning close, he blew hot pink opium smoke in my face. I coughed, scrunching my nose up at the smell, as my limbs went heavy and the world buzzed and went hazy.  
  
"Goodnight, my Prince..." Abel said as he tucked me against his chest -how did I know his name? All I knew was he was a Caterpillar… wait… how did I even know that much? -and kissed my forehead sweetly; I was unable to stop his movements, "please, remember. Please remember and come back to us… save us."  
  
My head fell against his chest as the lights went out.

* * *

  _Flashback_  

> Flowers of orange, white, yellow and pastels swayed softly in the breeze as butterflies -some looking like pieces of bread flying about with butter spread on them, some with wings that glittered and pulsed -fluttered and hovered over the intoxicating smell of flora. The royal garden was massive and beautiful; currently, I was sitting in a white framed gazebo -designed so the top of the gazebo was just the wooden skeleton of a roof while white and purple speckled flowers climbed up the sides, acting as a curtain around the sides and providing shade like a roof -near the large sized pond filled with vegetation -like moss, algae, lily pads and cat tails -fish, ducks, swans and Canadian geese. I remembered how the White Rabbit and I had come almost to this exact same spot last week, knowing it was secluded by the sweeping and weeping willow trees, and shared scandalous kisses while laying on the grass. It wasn't the first time. No, far from it. Ever since he had asked me to give him a tour of my home almost two months ago, there had been something that bloomed between us. He had come once a week since that first tour where we walked so close our sides brushed. How we actually, officially, secretly, became a pair was actually rather interesting; you see-.  
>    
>  _"Matthew!"_  
>    
>  "Y-Yes?" I squeaked, startled out of thoughts of how good Gilbert tasted, how good his hands felt on my hips and my back when he embraced me.  
>    
>  "Are you even paying attention to the lesson?" Abel sighed, knowing the answer to that question. Abel was one of the many tutors I had, being a prince I couldn't exactly go to school with all the other kids my age, and taught me maths and sciences,  had taught me since I was five and old enough to be taught. Tutors came and went, but he was one of the few that stayed no matter what opportunities were thrown his way. He was loyal, kind and strict.  
>    
>  "Of course I am!"  
>    
>  "Really?" he asked, voice dripping in skepticism as he raised his eyebrow, "Then answer me this-.” He rattled off a bunch of words that I had no idea what they meant, a serious look on his face and muscles in his face twitching from anger and irritation.
> 
>   
>  "... I wouldn't have been able to answer that even if I had been paying attention!" I snapped, face red in frustration and embarrassment. I literally had no idea what he was asking me, all I heard was a bunch of sounds that were supposed to be words that actually mattered to me.  
>    
>  "Ah~ but you do admit that you weren't paying attention," Abel said smugly, closing the textbook in his left hand with a thump.  
>    
>  "...Goddamn it..."  
>    
>  "Such language is not proper for a prince," the Caterpillar scolded lightly, placing the text book on the small, circular, pale blue ceramic table, right beside the sweating glasses of iced tea and the tray of maple cookies and leaf crisps. "Matthew, child, what is on your mind?" he asked, removing his glasses and setting them on top of the over sized book, "You are usually so diligent during lessons, even if you hold little interest for them."  
>    
>  I blushed, pulling my knees to my chest and resting my chin on the top of them. I thought of Gilbert and his messy hair, his tall rabbit ears and how he had the air of a scoundrel, a barbarian, although a refined one. How Gilbert's gazed burned through me and made me feel a chill in the most pleasurable of places; how his hands were firm yet left me no pain, touching me like an idol of some god. How my body and insides felt alive, how his embrace and touch made my knees weaken, how his lips and whispers drew out the animal inside of me, the animal that was _me_ , making me desire conquest. I wanted to take and be taken, never returning nor giving back; I wanted a collar around my neck and a chain around his. With him I was purely animal, although he called me “Matthew” it was only in public; with him -alone -I was his Birdie, his Minx, his Angel, his Vixen, his Beast, his Pet, his Master. His Lover. We hadn't had sex yet but I wanted it. Soon. Of course I couldn't tell my tutor this, so instead I settled with, "It was just something stupid."  
>    
>  "Nothing is ever stupid," Abel said, sitting beside me on the wooden bench built into the gazebo, "I consider you family, my lord prince. Like a nephew. You can talk to me about anything. I would never judge you."  
>    
>  What was the harm? I had wanted to talk to someone about this so much, my insides were practically quivering with anticipation. "I… I was thinking about… about a b-boy..."  
>    
>  "A boy?" the Caterpillar chuckled, "That is perfectly normal! Who is the lucky young noble?"  
>    
>  "He's...He's not a noble..." I gulped, looking away from his face, turning to look at the pond water that glittered in the sunlight and the lovely knee high flowers framing it.  
>    
>  "...O-Oh?"  
>    
>  "...Oui..."  
>    
>  Abel coughed into his fist awkwardly. The reason why Gilbert and I hadn't gone public was for a lot of reasons. The biggest was that I, as a royal, was not allowed to marry or act on feelings with someone that didn't hold a title. Gilbert and I were not allowed to love each other, hold each other, kiss each other; in the past, if the forbidden pair was caught then the commoner could be arrested for treason, thrown in jail or executed and the royal would be publically disowned from their family and given a lower title. Gilbert could die as I would be publicly shamed and demoted to a Duke. It was hardly fair but I, at least, was comforted by the fact that my parents had a "no kill" policy. Then again, that could change. This was a law with some flexibility for other nobles like Lords, Ladies, Dukes and Duchesses; but, for a Prince or any other member of the royal family, there were no loopholes. Royalty was not allowed to ever be caught in a compromising position with other nobility or commoners because it was necessary that they were viewed as virgin-pure before marriage. They weren't allowed to marry or bed commoners either. I had to keep the perception of purity and honesty and goodness, but I loved Gilbert with a passion that trumped the opinions of my people, if I were honest about it. "A-And what is his occupation exactly?" my tutor asked hesitantly, almost not wanting to know the answer.  
>    
>  Well, here I was. About to give my tutor a heart attack. "He's… He's a servant." This was even more taboo. Sure, there were servants specifically for sex but it had been some time since the royal family, at least ours, had any (vaguely, I did remember an Oriental man from my childhood, someone who was kind and warm, that I heard servants call my father's consort, but he had disappeared by the time I was six years old. Occassionally, I heard whispers of him being at my aunt's palace, not as a consort or anything related to sex but as a dancer and entertainer). Having sex with a servant not meant for the deed, falling in love with one, was absolutely scandalous and could ruin a family's reputation.  
>    
>  _"What?!"_ Abel hissed, jerking to his feet and beginning to pace, "Matthew, I know you know what could hap-!"  
>    
>  "I do… I know..." I whimpered, hanging my head. These thoughts had been swirling around in my mind since we kissed for the first time and I was so lost. "I haven't… _acted_ upon these thoughts" -lies, just last week I had let him press me into the grass a few feet away from the very gazebo my tutor and I were currently sitting in, and leave dazzling hickeys on my fleshy neck -"but I love him… and-and I think he loves me too-."  
>    
>  _"No, Matthew!"_ Abel nearly shouted, making me jump, tears in my eyes, "You know the consequences. You have to end this! If not for your sake then his! He will die; your parents wouldn't even have to call for an execution. He will either rot in jail or the people will use their own hands to seek justice against the predator who defiled and corrupted their innocent, young, pure little lamb of a prince."  
>    
>  "But-!"  
>    
>  "Do you want to see the boy you're infatuated with die?"  
>    
>  "N… Non..." I whimpered, curling in on myself, "I'll… I'll do it… I'll end it..."  
>    
>  In the end I couldn't do it. He had shown up the next day, when I didn't have lessons, and we walked to a secluded part of the garden, hidden by mushrooms at least seven feet tall. I swore I would do it, I didn't want any harm to come to Gilbert, I loved him too much to see that happen, but… after we were hidden from prying eyes, he had wrapped his arms around my waist -it felt like his arms _belonged_ there -and pressed kisses and little nips down the side of my neck. "G-G-Gil… I… we… talk...?"  
>    
>  "Later," he moaned, hand gripping my ass and pushing our bodies closer, making me moan and rotate my hips; his lips traveled down to my collar bone, sucking purpling bruises on my pure skin. He was the only one that could make me so willing to be defiled, so hungry for it. Gilbert was the only one who ever challenged the thinking engrained into my being since birth, he challenged and let me correct; with him by my side, I became _me_ , not the prince everyone thought I was. "I missed you, mein schatz."  
>    
>  And just like that, all desire to end my relationship with the albino, to end this beautiful thing that had become _us_ , simply vanished. I only wanted Gilbert, I wanted him to touch me, love me, kiss me, hold me. This man was my addiction, one that I loved and needed. Yes, he was my everything and he made _me_ everything. "I missed you too," I mewled as pleasure began to crawl towards my abdomen, feeling his fingers slide down the front of my shirt, trailing the buttons -I had begun to dress more casually around him, this time I was wearing a simple white button down with a dove embroidered in silver on the left breast side pocket, light grey leggings, my hair in a loose ponytail with a silver ribbon and black slip ons. "Let me show you how much I missed you," I insisted, pushing him and guiding him backwards, until his back hit the stem of a tall mushroom.  
>    
>  "Vögelchen-?"  
>    
>  "Shhh, Gilbert, let me make you feel good," I whispered, kissing across his jaw to his throat, where I began to suck and sink my teeth into his pale skin, leaving my own love bites on him. I felt the moan in his throat against my lips and smirked. My hands traveled down the front of his brown tail coat that had a red rose, flower print and his brown button down shirt, going to the front of his khaki colored trousers.  
>    
>  He stopped my hands, "M-Mattie… you don't ha-have to do this..."  
>    
>  "I know," I giggled, pressing the palms of my hands against Gilbert's growing bulge and rubbing, "I want to..." His head tilted back, hitting the stem of the mushroom as he groaned, his rabbit eyes flickering. "It must be torture for you..." I teased, smirking as I gripped his cock through the confines of his trousers, making him gasp, "I heard that, someone who has Leporidae genes in their body, has a high sex drive." His hips bucked into my hand as I tugged and twisted my wrist. "Has it been painful, Gil?" I asked, surprising myself at how merciless I was, as I stopped jerking him off -causing him to groan in displeasure -and trailed my fingers to the button of his trousers, "Not being able to touch me? When we're lying on the grass, your body on top of mine and our lips touching, but not being ravish me with naught but your tongue? Don't you wish you could just tear off my clothes, like the animal you are, mark my skin and make it pretty with love bites? Don't you wish for me to scream your name as I come? To paint our bodies as if they were pieces of canvases?"  
>    
>  "Ja," he said huskily, "Ja, so painful, Birdie..."  
>    
>  I unlatched the button and, ever so slowly, pulled down the zipper. "Do you want me to help you, then? Do you want me to stop the pain?"  
>    
>  His breath was uneven, now, his face dusted light pink and screwed up in sexual frustration and slipping self control. "M-Matthew..." His words faded as I pulled down his trousers and sank to my knees. "You don't… you don't have-."  
>    
>  "I know," I murmured once again as his underwear slid down, revealing his erection that, to be honest, left me a little intimidated, "But I..." -I inched forward, holding his hips and keeping them from thrusting too much -"I want to..."  
>    
>  A feral groan slipped passed his lips, Gilbert's hands clenching my hair in fist fulls as I licked up his erection. It had an indescribable taste but I continued licking and sucking on the sides until I made my way to the head, where I slowly sucked it passed my lips. "Gott," I heard Gilbert groan and smiled, my tongue tickling beneath the slit as I eased it further into my mouth, "Birdie -your _mouth!"_ I hummed in response, making him cry out, he jerked his hips, trying to buck further into my mouth but was held back by my hands; he growled in irritation, hands squeezing the sides of my head as he shoved my mouth down further onto his erection. My gasp was muffled as I accommodated my throat to his girth, surprised at how much I liked the feeling of his hot length sitting in my throat; I worked my lips around him, saliva dripping down my chin, as I pulled back, my teeth scraping lightly over the skin, my tongue dipping into the slit before I eased it back into my mouth. "B-Birdie… Matt...ie… I'm… I'm gonna-." I ignored his warnings, swallowing around him and fondling his balls, humming until he came with a feral snarl, bending over my head and coming deep in my mouth. It was salty, tangy and weird but I gladly swallowed it, wiping the excess away on my hand then cleaning my hand off on the grass -figuring it was better for my parents and teachers to see dirt on my hand then cum.  
>    
>  "Are you alright, darling?" I asked, ignoring the pain in my trousers to stand up and worriedly fret over Gilbert's appearance. He was red in the face, saliva hanging off his lips, eyes closed and his breathing wheezy and heavy.  
>    
>  His white rabbit ears twitched, his eyes slowly opening to give me a calm, measured look. "More than alright. You are an angel." I giggled, my face blushing, but my laughter quickly died when I felt a hand on my groin, gripping my member and giving it a harsh tug; I gasped, my knees quivering and turning to jelly. "Now, mein liebe, it is your turn."

* * *

 I opened my eyes slowly, meeting the blue-green eyes of the Caterpillar. "You're..."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And you saw-."  
  
"Yes. I did. I knew all along that you had never broken your attachment to the man. It's all my fault that you're -the kingdom -is in this situation."  
  
"Non, Abel, please don't say that..." I said, quickly sitting up to cup his cheek, he leaned into my hand, his eyes immediately focusing on my face and listening intently to my words. "This is all the Red Queen's fault."  
  
"You have regained your memories, my prince?" he asked in such a hopeful tone that it made me feel sick to my stomach.  
  
I let my reassuring smile drop to an expression of despair and anxiety, "N-No… I only remember some things about Gilbert… how we met, random moments of togetherness… enough to know that we had a… a romantic relationship and that I was prince, son of the White King and Queen. That the Red Queen, my aunt, did something… she did something to me. Something bad. That's… That's all."  
  
"You remember that the Red Queen did this? She's after you, she will kill you!" Abel said, panicked; he gripped my shoulders, pulling me to his chest and wrapping his arms around my torso protectively, gently rocking me as a mother would her child, "Please, you must go to the Duchess, you can't let that evil woman get you!" The ground started shaking, like an earthquake, and I clutched tight to the back of his shirt, searching for comfort in a man that was all too familiar to me now; I knew him and loved him like an uncle despite the disagreements and debates that had been so prevalent in our relationship before… before the Red Queen did whatever she did to me. "That's them! You have to run!" the Caterpillar insisting, ripping off a chunk of the mushroom we were sitting on, "Run far, far away from here and don't turn back! When you're far enough away, eat a little of this and you'll return to your normal size. Now, go!"  
  
He pushed me off the mushroom and I landed on my legs awkwardly, stumbling into a run. I pushed my way through the tall, uneven blades of grass, tears wetting my cheeks as I heard the sound of footsteps, cloth tearing and the sound of swords clanking together. They would get him, I know they would, but I couldn't stop. I knew that. Maybe it was due to the new discovery that I was royalty; that I pushed my way through the grass, falling more than once, and only stopping when my limbs had gone numb and I couldn't breathe, falling onto my side in exhaustion.  
  
Once I had regained my strength, after an endless amount of running and after an endless amount of time just lying amount dirt and tree roots that seemed giant, I brought the mushroom chunk to my mouth and bit off a corner. I swallowed it, scrunching my nose up in distaste at the bitter, overwhelming flavor; gritting my teeth in anticipation for the pain, I closed my eyes, felt my bones shift and my clothes tighten. My eyelids fluttered open and I saw that the grass was shorter and I was bigger; I dusted the dirt from my short dress - _fuck, I forgot I was wearing this thing!_ -and looked around. Six foot-three inch flowers and snarled trees hid me from the view of the Red Soldiers and, in front of me was an strangely wide, oval clearing with a mansion in the middle. The house was large and square, made of grey brick, a black slate roof, white windows, a bright, blue door and flower boxes in the windows filled with brightly spotted, and striped, flowers. Hearing rustling behind me, and fearing the worst, I ran toward the house as fast as I could, hoping they would know me and would be an ally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit  
> Abel/Netherlands as The Caterpillar


	7. A Brief Trip Into the Mind of a Delusional Queen and Her Dysfunctional Castle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Get a little taste of what its like in the castle for the Queen of Hearts. 
> 
> Bad things happen.
> 
> Oh, you also find out that the father of Katyusha, Ivan and Natalya was kind of a mad king/dick.

The Queen of Hearts sat on her throne, her left leg crossed over the right as her left foot jiggled in the air as she awaited the arrival of her… guest.  
  
"Your grace, the prisoner is here," announced her frog servant, Toris.   
  
"Excellent, bring him in!" she ordered with a toothy grin and a clap of her hands. The Queen turned to the rest of her court, Ivan, Yao, Yao's family, her favorite servant, the Knave of Hearts and, of course, her White Rabbit. "Attention! Everyone, we have a special, special guest today~! Oh! Knave, you may want to stand right here beside me for this one."   
  
With a confused smile, the Knave stood from his seated position across from Gilbert, taking his place beside his Queen. "Si? Your grace?"   
  
Natalya simply smiled, watching excitedly as members of her Imperial Guard brought in the prisoner, who was digging in his heels, spitting curses and swears all the while, as he was dragged in chains. Lots of them. Chains cuffing his wrists together in front of him, a chain around his neck -like a dog -and chains around his ankles. He had olive skin, hazel eyes, his clothes torn and brunette hair with a curl in it. "Don't fucking touch me, you _fucking bastards-!"_   
  
"Lovino Vargas. Tweedle Dee. What a pleasure," Natalya said with a sadistic smile, her eyes traveling to her Knave; he was no longer smiling, instead his face was tight and pale, his hands clenched in an attempt to hide their shaking, which he failed at, "Knave, don't you want to say 'hello' to your lover?"   
  
Lovino instantly quieted, his face taking on the same tight, pale qualities that Antonio had. "I-."   
  
"Tweedle Dee, I hear you have been helping the Alice," Natalya cut in, getting to the point, "Is this true?"   
  
"...yes..."   
  
"An honest one," she laughed, genuinely amused, especially as she saw the Knave flinch, "Lovino, you are going to tell me where the Alice is."   
  
The brunette's fearful gaze suddenly changed, becoming one of defiance. Hatred. "Over your fucking dead body!" he shouted, once again struggling against his chains, "You're fucking stupid if you think I'm gonna tell you shit, you fucking bitch!"   
  
_This little brat,_ Natalya thought, frowning in her anger, _it's about time I stop being so nice._ "So you're claiming treason then?"   
  
"How can I betray a false queen? You are nothing but a jealous _bitch_ who tried to kill a young boy!" he spat back, growling at her like a feral dog, "You are nothing! No one here is loyal to you, we've never have been! Not when you took our real queen from us and not now that the true heir is-!" Lovino's rant was cut off by a wave of the Queen's hand and a guard punching him in the stomach. He gasped, the air knocked out of him as he nearly collapsed onto his knees in pain; he would've, too, if it weren't for the guards holding him up.   
  
"Lovi!"   
  
"Remember your place, you disgusting peasant," she snarled as her Knave tried to step forward, only to be stopped by Natalya extending her arm to block his path, "How dare you insult me in my own home!"   
  
"...I-I refuse to bow down to you..." Lovino rasped, straightening up shakily and swallowing thickly, "You can beat me all you want… you will not weaken me… I will not betray the true King and Queen!"   
  
"Oh, beatings won't work?" she questioned spitefully, a sickening sweet smile on her face, "How about rape, then? My guards can be ruthless, you know." With a wave of her hand, the guards around Lovino smirked evilly, one guard kicking out his legs to force the young man to fall to his knees harshly, another yanking on the chains belonging to his hands and forcing Lovino to fall onto his face, and the third guard yanking at the neck chain, making it difficult for Lovino to breathe and forcing him to tilt his head upward.   
  
"Mi tomate!" she heard her Knave cry, outraged, and she watched as if she was a spectator in a sporting arena as her Knave charged forward, drawing the sword from the scabbard at his waist and plunging it into the face of the guard with a grip on Lovino's neck chain. The two guards that were holding Lovino let the young man go, moving to charge at the tanned man, but he wasn't Natalya's Knave for nothing; he blocked their advances, punching one in the face and stabbing the other in the neck, spinning around to wedge his sword between the other's armor plates and shove his blade into the guard's rib cage and into the other's lung. The three guards laid dead in Natalya's throne room and she laughed hysterically, her Knave rushing to his lover, scooping him up in his arms and holding him close, making sure the guards hadn't done too much damage.   
  
"Perhaps having you watch as I behead your brother will be more effective?" Natalya purred, receiving a glare from Antonio and a panicked look from his lover as the Knave pulled him closer.   
  
"Sister, please call down." The Queen looked over to her brother, who was no longer sitting across from Yao and talking, but instead looking at her crossly. "You have crossed the line. This is too much."   
  
"And what do you suppose we do?" she snapped, glaring at him as her hands clenched on the arms of her throne, "The Alice is a threat to our kingdom -to me! Do you want him to kill me?!"   
  
"Sister, you are exaggerating. Calm yourself," the older sibling said coldly, holding his hands behind his back as he stepped forward, closer to Antonio and Lovino, the latter shrinking back in fear, "As for you two… Knave, take your lover away from here. You are relieved for the day." With that, he bent down and retrieved a ring of keys from one of the corpses of the soldiers before he tossed the keys to Lovino's chains at the Knave -who easily caught them with a thankful expression on his face.   
  
"Thank you… your grace," he said, quickly bowing to Ivan before undoing Lovino's restraints, picking the smaller man up bridal style and striding from the room.   
  
_"Ivan-!"_   
  
"Do you not trust my judgment, Natalya? I know what I am doing, have a little faith," Ivan said bitterly with a harsh glare in his sister's direction. The Queen shrunk under his glare, guilt crashing into her.   
  
Who was she to doubt her beloved King? "I… I'm sorry-."   
  
"Please do not humiliate prisoners without asking my opinion," he said simply, sitting back down in his spot across from Yao, "I am a ruler of this kingdom, too."   
  
She gulped and nodded, sitting back in her throne and looking around her throne room with a red face. Conversation began to pick back up, filling the silence with noise once again.   
  
"Your grace?" Lili said hurrying to her queen, her small tail drooped low and her puppy ears pressed flat against the top of her head, "Your grace, shall I tell the guards to halt their departure?"   
  
"...No… no..." she murmured, rubbing a hand down her face with a heavy sigh, "The King has ordered them to be free, so it shall be done. Just..." -the Queen sighed -"I need to drink. Something strong."   
  
"Right away, your grace," the young servant girl said with a curtsy, about to scramble off to fetch some strong alcohol from the kitchen, but was called back by her Queen. "Y-Yes?"   
  
"Lili, you are a sweet, darling, girl," Natalia said, caressing the blonde's cheek, which suddenly blossomed with color, with her knuckles, "You are so, so good to me..."   
  
"Th-Thank you, your grace," she stammered, blushing and inclining her head, "I… I'll go and get you your drink now..."   
  
"Good girl," Natalya said warmly, patting her servant's head. She watched the girl scurry off through the servant's door, but soon turned her attention to her brother. Her darling brother, who had always stuck by her and loved her… the same brother who was now listening intently to Yao, who was talking to him enthusiastically, his cigarette holder between his lips as he talked around it, Ivan nodding and laughing every once in awhile. Then there was her White Rabbit, the one who was supposed to obey her every command, every whim, fight for her to the death… the same one who was staring longingly out the window, his scabbed back facing the rest of the room. Why do the people most important to me always leave me?   
  
"Sister."   
  
She looked up at her brother and raised an eyebrow. "What?"   
  
"I would like to inform you that I must take my leave. I must handle important business down at the Duchess' manor; I already had a servant warn him of my arrival."   
  
With a frown, Natalya sighed, hardly believing a word of it, but she still waved a dismissive hand, "Fine, be on your leave then." Ivan bowed, smiling up at her and snatching her hand. He kissed her ring, like he was supposed to do, but, nevertheless, Natalya's heart still fluttered. She watched him turn and leave, passing by Yao who was now talking to another member of the court, his sister's wife -Lien. The King pressed a hand to Yao's shoulder, and she watched with growing jealousy as Yao leaned into his touch before the King walked away and out of the giant double doors of the throne room. Again, she seethed, but, alas, she knew how everyone in court lusted for her brother. She saw their eyes. Watching him as he passed by, lingering. How dare they deem it proper to feast their eyes on her king?! To let their eyes drink in their fill-she knew of their rabid appetites!   
  
"Your grace?"   
  
She turned to her favorite servant, smiling once she saw the chute of a bubbling, dark red liquid. "Thank you, darling puppy," the Queen said, turning to Lili. Natalya remembered that Lili's relative was the Duck, a supporter of the White Queen but avid pacifist and neutralist; quickly, she cast it from her mind. Lili was her favorite, her favorite servant, and her most loyal. The Queen wouldn't touch her family.

* * *

 Natalya let herself into her brother's chambers. It was empty but a servant had started a fire in the fireplace, the red and gold tapestries fluttering against the cool, white marble wall of the castle. The fireplace was to the right, two red, high back chairs in front of the fireplace and a small, round table between the two chairs, in the middle of the room was a large four post bed with sheer, black curtains surrounding the bed, the bed was covered in thick gold blankets and white silk sheets; at the end of the bed was a large, heavy, old chest with a fading design of hearts and chess pieces, next to the doors to the bedroom was a shelf and cabinet full of liquour and glasses, and to the left were two doors. One door led to the King's private bathroom and the other led to a smaller room that held the King's medals, clothes and various jewels and gems. Natalya closed the door to the King's chambers, running her fingertips along the heavy, wood frames of the furniture and the fragile surfaces of various knickknacks and trophies, even the snout of a Bandersnatch that the King killed then had its head stuffed and mounted to the wall.  
  
Tonight would be the night she would surprise him. Surprise the King, her Ivan, and they'd finally become one. She had seen the looks Ivan had been giving her and knew, deep in her soul, that tonight would be when she would finally get what she wanted, Ivan's love, adoration and cock. She wore a sheer, white nightgown under a white, lace robe that trailed behind her bare feet, her hair rested against her back and she wore no make up or jewels. Natalya wanted this night to be natural and perfect.  
  
She hid in the room that contained her brother's clothes, awaiting his return. The servants said that he had just come back and was eating a late dinner; knowing her brother, he'd return to his room and drink before undressing for bed. All she had to do was wait.  
  
Half an hour later, or what felt like half an hour later, the door to Ivan's chamber opened and Natalya peeked through the slats in the door. In walked Ivan, wearing a black military suit, white kidskin gloves, a red cape with a gold lining hanging off his right shoulder and polished black shoes. Following closely behind was Yao, who had changed into a different outfit; he wore a lighter robe that clung tightly to his skin, it was a bright shade of blood red, much different from his usual dark crimson, with the black silhouettes of birds and gold flecks as their eyes. The robe was shorter, it didn't trail behind Yao as his other robes did, and ended just below his knees, it was looser at the top with long, bell sleeves that went pasted his fingertips. Yao's hair was in the same braid that it always was but he lacked shoes.  
  
It irritated Natalia that Yao's legs were so smooth.  
  
"You look tired, perhaps you should hold off on the drink, for now, aru?" he suggested in that same annoyingly soft and light voice of his.  
  
"They say drink helps sooth a tired soul," Ivan retorted, pouring clear liquid into a wide glass only five inches tall, he looked over his shoulder at Yao, "You will drink."  
  
"Not much."  
  
"You will drink, though?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Ivan poured two glasses but left them on the little table connected to the liquor cabinet. Turning, he walked over towards his bed, "Undress me."  
  
The Oriental man smiled, giving a quiet little sigh, as he approached the king and stripped him of his clothes. His slim hands peeled off Ivan's clothes, layer by layer, and carefully folded them, until Ivan was left standing in his white cotton breeches (underwear) and his white socks. "My King," Yao said, running his hands over the scars that littered the taller man's torso, "if only I had time to map your body..."  
  
Natalya hated Yao. Hated that slutty dancer with a burning, intense passion. She was the one that should be undressing the King, she should be the one touching his scars, mapping them, making Ivan sigh with delight!  
  
"We have all the time in the world. I will make it so."  
  
Ivan took the two glasses, handing one to Yao, as they both sat in the chairs in front of the fireplace. "...How did it go with the Duchess?"  
  
"It well as you'd expect," Ivan sighed, "The Duchess wouldn't discuss peace, wouldn't hear a word of it as long as our conditions haven't changed, and his Cook nearly cracked my ribs trying to get me out of the manor."  
  
"They have always been difficult; they and the people they command."  
  
They sat in silence for a no less than ten minutes before Ivan commanded, in a quiet voice, "Come here."  
  
Yao unfolded himself gracefully from the chair, setting his empty glass down before standing in front of his king. He slipped a leg between Ivan's knees, pushing his knee up between Ivan's thighs, a small smirk gracing his feline like face, "I am yours to command, your grace."  
  
Natalya's breathing faltered, nearly stopping completely when she watched as Ivan slid his ungloved hands up Yao's legs -why were his legs so long? And smooth?! -to rest at Yao's hips. The peasant -he was wealthy but his lack of noble blood made him no better than a peasant -had his eyes half lidded and he exhaled deeply in satisfaction, resting his hands on Ivan's shoulders. The King drew him closer, until Yao was practically in his lap, and let his hands travel beneath the folds of Yao's robe to message creamy inner thighs. "Strip. For. Me," Ivan breathed against the column of Yao's throat, letting his tongue lick a stripe up the pale flesh, Yao whimpered, and Ivan’s lips lingered.  
  
Yao stood, removing his robe with shaking, excited hands and letting it drop and pool around his feet.  
  
Ivan stared in awe, running his hands up Yao's sides, caressing his bare thighs, hips, waist, stomach and ass. His fingertips traced the tattoo around his navel, it was usually covered by makeup or paint when he danced, but this time it was bare, letting Ivan see the black and silver markings of chess pieces and geometric spirals around his navel and under it. The mark of the White King's whore. Consort was the technical term but there was no difference.  
  
"Why are you touching me like you never have before?" Yao whispered, his face crimson, he tilted up Ivan's chin so that he was no longer looking at another King's mark, but Yao couldn't meet Ivan's eyes.  
  
_Serves the whore right,_ Natalya thought, her heart hammering in her ears, _how dare he touch my Ivan with his impure hands!_ _  
_  
"Every night I spend with you, it's like our first time," he said, his tongue laving and rimming Yao's navel, mouthing the tattoo, "Only a lot less awkward."  
  
Yao let out a breathy laugh that came across as a gasp. "You are such a romantic..."  
  
"It is one of my faults, my sunflower," Ivan said, pulling away from the Oriental's now glistening stomach as he pressed his thumbs into the two diagonal scars just above either side of Yao's hips.  
  
Natalya's heart skipped a beat. _His… His s-sunflower?_ Her vision wavered and she ran her sleeve over her eyes.  
  
"...My love… I know what my… I know what the late Red King did to you… I read your file when I was looking for Gilbert's."  
  
Natalya heard something fall apart within her chest.  
  
Yao turned ashy, attempting to pull away from Ivan but the King's strength was superior, "Your grace-."  
  
"Enough of that," he quietly scolded, pulling Yao closer again to kiss the scars on his hips, "My father experimented on you, Gilbert, Gilbert's brother. He made the two of them rabbits and soldiers. You… You were different. Made to cause ruin in the White Court. A Consort for the White King, traditionally male to avoid accidental bastards and threats to the throne… My father changed that didn't he? He wanted you to have a bastard so Matthew would never take the throne."  
  
"...He wanted a pawn… something to manipulate..." the older man added quietly, looking down at the ground, his bangs hiding his face, "I couldn't do it… I couldn't bring a child into a world like that… with a man like that controlling its every action… I… I got rid of it whenever I found out… I don't even know if I can have children anymore..."  
  
Ivan reached up, gently wiping away Yao's tears as he sobbed quietly. "I don't want to pull out of you anymore," the King admitted, pulling Yao down into his lap, holding him, "I want to stay in you as we make love and never part from you again. If… If children come of that, I don't mind..."  
  
Natalya tried not to gasp, placing a hand over her mouth to hide her horror. _No...NO! This isn’t right! This wasn’t how tonight was supposed to go!_ _  
_  
_"Ivan?!"_ Yao exclaimed in disbelief and alarm, "W-What?! Aiyah, you don't know… enough of your foolishness!"  
  
"No, Yao, I love you," he said, pulling Yao into a steamy kiss, "I love you and I want to have children with you."  
  
Everything was silent as Natalya heard her heart break and thick droplets of tears poured from her eyes. _NO!_  
  
As an answer, Yao pulled his hair from it's braid, it flowed around his shoulders, and drew Ivan into a kiss. He threaded his fingers through Ivan's beige-blonde hair and gripped, hard, pushing his tongue into Ivan's mouth and starting a kiss that had saliva dripping off the corners of their mouths and down, off their chins.  
  
Natalya sobbed quietly as she watched Yao moan and cry out the whore her father intended him to be as he was finger fucked in the chair, scream as he was pinned to the wall, fucked until he came, screaming, pinned to the floor and ravished so hard from behind that he had rug burn on his elbows, lower arms and knees. whimpering and moaning. She was even forced to watch as Ivan carried Yao to his bed, gently laying the dark haired man on it, entwining their fingers, and slowly made love to Yao until Ivan came, staying inside, and Yao had a dry orgasm, spasming and gasping. Yao and Ivan laid together, panting on the bed. "Soon, we will have children..." Ivan said, caressing Yao's lower stomach.  
  
"You don't know that. What if I'm not able to anymore? Maybe I have rejected them too many times. Maybe I am too old."  
  
"Then that is fine. We'll adopt. I will still love you."  
  
"...I know..."  
  
"Do you?"  
  
"...Yes."  
  
Yao rested his cheek against Ivan's chest, Ivan curling around the smaller male and pulling up the covers. They laid in bed, holding each other and falling asleep in each other's arms, beneath a blanket colored gold. Once their breathing slowed and there was no question to rather or not they were asleep, Natalya emerged from her hiding place.  
  
Slowly, she made her way to the foot of Ivan's bed and stared at the two sleeping figures with tear stained cheeks. _How could he...? I love him..._ Natalya stared with wide, betrayed eyes, taking in her darling brother's peaceful face and the way he held and cuddled with that no good whore! _How dare he...? I'm the Queen! A Queen is supposed to be with her King!_ She backed out of the room, clutching her hands together and holding them between her breasts. _He chose this whore over me?! He's a poor whore! A slut! No better than a prostitute! And you want to stick your dick in that, my darling brother?! What has he done to you?! You want your children in THAT?! He is nothing but a mutation, a weapon! HE IS NOTHING!_ Natalya tore open the door and ran down the hallway -oblivious to Yao's open eyes and his self righteous, self satisfied smirk as he watched her run -ignoring all the servants she passed by. She ran to her room, throwing open the door and slamming it shut, her hair flying about her and giving her a deranged look.  
  
"Your Grace?" Lili sat up from where she had been sitting on the loveseat in front of the fireplace. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, smiling sheepishly, "I'm terribly sorry, Your Grace! I was waiting for you and I fell asleep-."  
  
"Take off your clothes."  
  
"E-Excuse me? What do you mean-?"  
  
"I said take off your clothes. _Now."_  
  
"Your Grace-?"  
  
"You dare defy me?!" Natalya screamed, lunging at the servant girl. The royal pinned Lili to the love seat, taking the young girl's wrists and holding them, sliding a knee up between Lili's thighs and hitching up the skirt of her uniform as she did. "I am your Queen! How… How dare you defy me! If I say undress then you _undress!"_ Natalya shoved herself off of Lili, grabbing the girl's wrist and hauling her into a standing position, Natalya sat on the loveseat and leaned back. Expectant. "Now… undress."  
  
Lili's shoulders shook as she struggled not to cry. She untied her white apron, dropping it to the ground, next, she loosened the ribbon holding the collar of her dress closed, with shaking hands she released the clasps holding the white cuffs on her wrists together, reaching back and unzipping her black uniform dress. She shrugged it off before, hesitantly, pushing it down to pool at her feet, leaving her to cower with her arms wrapped around her body, trying to shield her most intimate parts.  
  
"Come here, puppy."  
  
She obeyed the Queen's words, crawling onto the woman's lap. She closed her eyes, trying to block out what was being done to her.  
  
Long live the Queen...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalya/Belarus as The Red Queen/The Queen of Hearts  
> Ivan/Russia as The Red King/The King of Hearts  
> Gilbert/Prussia as The White Rabbit  
> Yao/China as a courtier/dancer  
> Antonio/Spain as The Knave of Hearts  
> Lovino/South Italy as Tweedle Dee  
> Lili/Liechtenstein as Puppy (a random character in the novel's)


	8. Pig and Pepper: Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alice looks for an ally in the Duchess and gets a suprise.

I ran forward, toward the mansion, and saw two footmen standing just outside the main door. One had longish, slightly messy brown hair and green tinted skin, wearing a green jacket, green slacks of the same shade with two frog like legs with webbed toes sticking out from them, white gloves covering his oddly shaped fingers, a pale green shirt, and a dark green tie; the other had neat, blonde hair, blue-green eyes behind a pair of spectacles, gills on the side of his neck and he was wearing a blue jacket, blue slacks of the same shade, white gloves covering oddly shaped hands, a pale blue shirt, a dark blue tie and there were a pair of dark blue, polished shoes sitting beside him on the ground, his webbed feet submurged in a bucket of water.   
  
I walked quietly over to them until I could hear them.   
  
"Eduard, I'm sorry, but this is for your duchess."   
  
"A letter from the Queen?"   
  
"A… An invitation to a War Council."   
  
"...Oh… I see..." the man in blue -Eduard -took the red envelope from the man in green's hands, "I will see that he gets it. Thank you, Toris."   
  
"Don't thank me. I know this isn't something to be thankful for..." Toris -the man in green -said with a sigh, "Meet me later tonight, we have to talk. Things at the castle have become even more volatile."   
  
Eduard nodded. "Yes, we will. But later. It seems we have company at the moment."   
  
Toris and I both tensed up. "D-D-D-Don't let me see!" Toris shrieked, beginning to run away, without looking back at me, "G-Good bye, Eduard!"   
  
"Good bye, Toris!" Eduard chuckled, waving at Toris' retreating figure, before turning to me with a friendly smile. "...I know who you are, Matthew."   
  
"D-Do you...?"   
  
"Yes. You may not but I still remember," he said, bowing to me, "I am Eduard, Fish Footman to the Duchess' mansion. It is an honor to be in your presence."   
  
"I-I-I..."   
  
"You need not speak. I assume you want to see the Duchess?"   
  
I nodded, embarrassed, shy and lost for words.   
  
"Then take this to him when you go in there," Eduard said, handing me the red envelope, "He'll know it's not from you. Just ask him what you want and the Duchess, or his cook, will handle the rest."   
  
"I-I -Thank you, Eduard," I gushed, taking the envelope and allowing Eduard to open the front door of the mansion.   
  
I walked in and gaped at the magnificence that wasn't gaudy. Everything was warm, cozy, but expensive. The walls of the hallway were painted light grey with hand painted and hand carved woodwork and wood floors faded by the sunlight. Picture frames hung on the wall but they were not expensive paintings of landscapes or castles or royalty, like I was expecting, instead they were paintings of people that looked far from royalty. These people had a well worn, loving feeling to them. I walked down the hallway, passing a formal, fancy parlor behind two glass doors to the left, then a little further down was a room filled with instruments to the left, then further down was an open dining room with a big, long, dark wood table and mint green walls. At the end of the hallway were two rooms. One was out of sight, behind a closed door, and the other was an open doorway that I walked into. The room smelled heavily of spices -especially of pepper -and at the stove stood a man  with glasses and an intimidating face wearing brown trousers, a long beige shirt that looked almost like a dress and a white apron and, in a rocking chair was a young man wearing a yellow, satin dress with a red flower print, a tight bodice, a full skirt with a white petticoat, white lace that went from the elbow length sleeves, all the way to his hands, and a large hat that matched the pattern of the dress. In the young, dress clad man's arms was a small baby dressed in white that wiggled and screamed, and at the man's feet, which were clad in red house slippers, was a white, long haired cat with blue eyes and a disturbing grin.   
  
"Berwald, darling, do you really have to add so much pepper?" the Duchess questioned, holding a handkerchief to his nose, sneezing slightly.   
  
"It adds flavor," he grumbled, accent thick, "If the Queen would give us good food once and awhile-." Berwald cut himself off to throw a glass pepper shaker against the wall, ignoring how it shattered and spilled all over the floor.   
  
The Duchess looked like he was about to say something when his eyes caught mine. "Oh, Ber, do behave, we have a guest," he said before turning his attention to his baby, rocking him, "Please, Peter, be quiet-."   
  
"-Mommy and Daddy have a guest, Peter," the cook said, turning off the stove and wiping off his hands, "you need to be quiet now."   
  
Baby Peter quieted, the Cook and the Duchess turning to look at me.   
  
"Oh, Berwald, it's Matthew~!" the Duchess exclaimed, moving Peter to rest on his shoulder, "He told us you may be coming here, isn't that right, Berwald?"   
  
"Uh-huh."   
  
"You must stay for dinner!" he said, standing up from his chair, gently rocking his baby side to side, "Do you need a change of clothes? I think you do. Here, Cheshire will show you to the guest room and spare clothes, won't you Cheshire? Oh and just hand that envelope to Cheshire, too."   
  
"Ruruna-o~" the cat purred, standing up and trotting towards me, he rubbed his face against my legs before leading me down the hall. I followed him, although my face scrunched up in confusion. The cat's hips shaw-shayed noticeably and he kept looking back, making sure I was following him and, seemingly, winking at me. The cat itself freaked me out but, still, I followed. I was learning quickly that fighting this strangeness got me nowhere.   
  
The cat guided me to a door, pushing it open with his paws. The bedroom was decorated in a simple way that felt warm and homey in different shades of browns and greens, there was a bed, an open door that revealed a bathroom, a vanity, a tall armoire and a dresser. "Ruruna-o~" the cat meowed, rubbing up against my rather dirty stockings, walking over to the dresser and propping himself up against it with his front paws.   
  
"Thank you, kitty," I said, kneeling down to scratch the cat's ears, to which he welcomed with a happy little purr, "I have two cats at home, you know. One of them is feral so he's outside unless he wants to sleep. His name is Kuma."   
  
"Ruruna-o~?"   
  
"The other one is a pretty little thing named Maple."   
  
Cheshire licked the tips of my fingers with his rough tongue before I gave him the envelope (which he bit down on) and walked away, rubbing up against the exposed part of my leg and thigh as he did, and trotting out the door.   
  
I smiled, having always had a soft spot for animals, before standing back up to close and lock the door; I went to the bathroom after that, filling the deep tub with hot water and calming soaps that smelled like vanilla, making the water turn a pale blue color. Stripping my clothes, I tossed them on the floor and sunk into the water, sighing as I did so. Unhurriedly, I cleaned the dirt from my skin, scrubbing until my skin was clean and bright pink, picking a pink soap from the basket full of options and lathering the strawberry scented soap into my hair. I was done in no less than thirty minutes and the bathroom was full of calming, sweet scented steam, colored purple from the shampoo and bath soaps; I wrapped a soft, fluffy towel around my shoulders after drying my hair before going back out into the bedroom. Opening the armoire, I shifted through the clothing, trying to find something that I liked and would -hopefully -fit me. Finally, I found something that pleased me and, miraculously, fit precisely.   
  
I put on a cream dress with a long, ruffly skirt, managing to get the bodice tied up on my own, and a beige frock coat. I found a pair of black boots which I quickly laced up before leaving out the door. Steadily, I was getting more accustomed to wearing such feminine clothing; the freedom it gave to my movements was liberating and they were unconfining. As soon as I opened the door, I almost tripped, Cheshire waiting for me patiently.   
  
"Oh, hello, Chesh," I said, kneeling down to scratch him behind the ears, "is dinner ready then?"   
  
"Ruruna-o~!"   
  
"Led the way."   
  
I followed the cat throughout the house, the layout of which I still didn't know, until I came into the dining room. Again, it was simply furnished, but the table was large and laden with dishes of strange delicacies, others, not only the Duchess, sitting around the table.   
  
"Oh, Matthew! Right on time!" the Duchess said, bouncing his baby from where he sat, "Come in, take a seat! I don't suppose you remember Lukas, Matthias and Emil? I know you don't, but that's alright, take a seat!"   
  
I obeyed, looking at the two empty seats still at the table, "Who else is coming?"   
  
"Oh, one is for my Berwald and the other is for-."   
  
"Hallo, mein angel."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Matthew/Canada as Alice  
> Eduard/Estonia as The Fish Footman  
> Toris/Lithuania as The Frog Footman  
> Berwald/Sweden as The Cook  
> Tino/Finland as The Duchess  
> Peter/Sealand as a baby


	9. Pig and Pepper: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is super late! I had a bit of an issue getting inspiration for this chapter (writer's block and all that) but I have it up now so... ehhhhhhhhh...

“The other one is for the White Rabbit,” the Duchess finished, amused, as I spun around, shocked to see my Gilbert standing in the doorway looking tired and ruffled but happy.

“Hey, Gil!” one of the men sitting at the table greeted enthusiastically, gracelessly getting up from the table and rounding it to pull the albino into a tight hug, “I’m so happy to see you…!”

Gilbert patted the blonde’s back, looking pained, amused and overwhelmed all at once, but he kept his eyes on me the entire time and it made my heart race, which briefly distracted me from the anger and jealousy bubbling hot under the surface of my skin. _How dare he, how dare he, how dare he-._

“Mathias, shit your ass down,” ordered another man with a scowl, “He’s probably exhausted and you’re not helping with your manhandling.”

“Besides, he probably wants to spend quality time with Mattie,” the Duchess said in a much gentler tone.

With a sigh, Mathias, the spiky haired blonde that had been acting so clingy, released Gilbert. “I was just greeting him, Tino…” the grown man pouted before turning to the other man and smiling, “Were you jealous, Nor-?”

"Don’t be stupid. Sit. Down.”

Seemingly not bothered by the cold attitude -in fact, Matthias seemed encouraged- he sat down next to the other man, planting a loud kiss on his cheek.

“You sit down right there by Matthew,” the Duchess, who I just found out was named Tino, said as he took his own seat, having changed into something still elegant and worthy of his station but much more casual than the dress he had on before -he wore a light blue tunic, a housecoat of a darker shade with a pattern of chess pieces and playing card symbols, skin tight white pants, a white scarf wrapped around his head and tan, knee high lace up boots, his fingers were also decorated with various jewels in blue or clear diamonds -and much more at ease than he had been earlier. “After Berwald brings in the food, I thought it would be a good idea to get right down to business. Even though you might not remember, Mattie, you know all of us.”

“You want to see how much he remembers, your grace?” Gilbert asked as he carefully sat down in his chair, purposefully brushing his leg against mine.

“We’re friends here, Gilbert,” the chef and Tino’s husband, Berwald, said caring in platters of food, also in a different outfit -he was much cleaner, wearing a white button down shirt tucked into a pair of brown trousers and a pair of well worn work boots- and looking slightly irritated before he turned to look at Tino, his face softening by a fraction, “Peter’s sleeping. Eduard said he’d keep an eye out in case he gets fussy during dinner.”

“Thank you, honey,” Tino said with a smile, beckoning the large man to sit down and, when Berwald heeded the command, their fingers immediately found each other and entangled together, “And my husband is right, Gilbert, in this room we are equals. We are not servant, or Lord, or Duke and Duchess or…” -Tino paused, considering his words before he finally said- “or even Prince.”

All eyes turned to me and I felt like crawling in a hole. _So it was all true then? I’m a… a prince?_ I felt Gil squeeze my hand beneath the table and tried to ground myself. I may not know everything or even understand everything, but Gilbert was by my side and, some way or another, he was special to me. He was my everything, in the past and the present. “I… don’t remember much,” I admitted, entwining the fingers of Gil and I beneath the table, “But I’m… a prince?”

“Yes, Matthew,” Tino said gently as the food was passed around, “There are two kingdoms in this world of ours. The Kingdom Of Hearts, which can also be called the Red Kingdom, which the Queen of Hearts” -I felt Gilbert tense- “and your aunt, Natalya, rules alongside her brother, Ivan. She inherited it from your grandfather, the Mad King” -Gilbert was squeezing my hand now, finger rhythmically rubbing circles into the back of my hand- “and Katyusha, your mother, married the king of The White Kingdom, your father, Alfred.”

I jerked at the name, choking a little. Alfred? My brother was named Alfred. My brother… I hadn’t even thought of my brother in all the time I had been here. It had to be because of everything that was happening right? That had to be it. Otherwise… it was as if I didn’t care about Alfred at all… “But what does that have to do with me?” I asked quickly, covering up my obvious reaction to Alfred’s name.

“Your… grandfather was a madman,” Gilbert spoke quietly from my side, “He used alchemy and… dark magic to do horrible things. He infected the water, causing people to mutate. The severity ranged from person to person, the obviousness of the effects. Your tutor, Abel, the Caterpillar, grew multiple limbs, Arthur the Hatter went mad.”

“I became able to have children,” Tino said with a bittersweet smile, “but I produce children that are often too weak to live long… our Peter is a little miracle…”

“My face… it is in this permanently frightening expression…” Berwald said as he took Tino’s hand and kissed his knuckles.

“It’s not so bad when you smile though, Ber,” the Duchess soothed, cupping his husband’s cheek with his free hand, his eyes full of love even though Berwald’s face was slightly threatening, “And when we’re doing other things~.”

_“Anyway._ Your grandfather infected the water and, privately, he experimented on humans. He brainwashed Natalya into believing his way of thinking. He turned my brother and I into… this, trying to make the perfect soldier and servant. All he wanted was power. He married Katyusha off to the White King in an attempt to control that kingdom but, when your mother failed to comply, he used… do you remember Yao?”

“Vaguely. He was kind.”

“Your grandfather did experiments on him, too. He sent Yao to be your father’s consort, to conceive a bastard that would threaten your right to the crown and to use as a tool to control your father. Yao… sacrificed a lot to keep that from happening.”

“I still don’t trust him,” the one who had ordered Mathias to sit said, turning to me seriously, “Mathias, Emil and I are lords and often spent time in the royal court of the White Kingdom. Yao may have seemed kind to you but he was manipulative. Cunning. He knew what strings to pull, what to say. That was not something your grandfather taught him. It was instinctual.”

“Isn’t that the game of court, Lukas?” Gilbert retorted, voice strained, “That you must charm those around you? Yao has lived a rough life, you cannot expect him to open up so easily.”

“He dances like a whore in the Red Kingdom!”

“How is he supposed to stay safe there if he doesn’t have a purpose? If he doesn’t seek the attention of those that he does not love?”

“Boys,” Berwald said, voice deep and stoic in warning, “Behave.”

The room was engulfed in silence as everyone began to eat, only interrupting the quiet occasionally.

“I… I need to know more. More about my aunt. Is she carrying on her father’s legacy? What has she done?” I finally asked after noticing that everyone was almost done.

“She has done more than that… she is… controlling. Trying to take away our freedom,” Emil said, speaking for the first time that night, his gaze intense but never once leaving me, “She does not wish us to speak ill of her or voice our opinions. She silences all of us with violence.”

“Your aunt is… she lost her mind and the goodness inside her long ago and it has only gotten worse,” Mathias said gravely, his tone filled with so much sadness, “To keep herself from being alone she chains us down so we never leave her out of fear. Fear, love -it is all the same to her now.”

“Your mother was a kind, gentle woman who found friends among royals and peasants. Natalya has always been… jealous and resentful of that,” Gilbert said carefully, he sounded as sad as Mathias but his voice was tight… as if there was more to his feelings that he couldn’t, or wouldn’t, voice, “She is mistreating the people of her kingdom, killing anyone who displeases her. Anyone that favors any monarch other than herself. There have been revolts, whispers of rebellion. They cry for you, for your parents, to unite the kingdoms and sit on the throne. She will not have it.”

“She wants you gone, Matthew,” Tino said urgently, leaning across the table to grab my hand tightly, “She will kill you if she finds you.”

“How… What do you want me to do?”

“You can stop her… to do that you’ll need to go to The Mad Hatter’s tomorrow.”

“Enough, you’re scaring him,” Emil said, sounding more than a bit irritated.

“Oh… yes I suppose I am. That was a lot to take in…” Tino apologized profusely, fretting in a motherly way.

“It’s late anyway. We should all sleep,” Berwald stated, standing and pulling his husband up with him -his grip and movements were gentle and firm and I couldn’t help but wonder if Berwald always treated Tino with such care (as if he might break) or if there was some other reason behind it, “Emil, Mathias and Lukas -your bedroom is the same. Gilbert you’ll be sleeping with Matthew. Don’t complain because I know you’ll mean none of it.”

I flushed a bright pink as everyone stood and found their way to their rooms. Gilbert and I didn't move, however, waiting for the other to break the awkward silence.

“What do you… remember about us?” It was Gilbert who broke it.

“I… I remember how we met. How you would deliver messages to my parents and lay in the garden with me. Our… w-well when I… the mushroom… and-.”

“When you- yeah,” Gilbert said, almost as red as I was, “What else?”

“How you used to call me your angel. And… a little bit of our first time,” I admitted, voice dropping into a whisper and I found myself unable to look at him, too embarrassed at the recounting. Dirty talk had never been my strong suit. “I remember… I know that I love you. I think you loved me, too.”

A rough, firm hand tilted my chin and I found Gilbert kneeling in front of me, his red eyes dark and swirling with something powerful, intense and intimidating. Sharp. “It's not the past tense, Matthew. My heart is yours. My soul is yours. My body is yours. Everything I am belongs to you.”

“I want you to kiss me.”

It was like the world held its breath as he slid his hand into my hair, gripping it loosely. My heart was beating faster and faster as he got closer, his other hand on my waist and pulling me forward. My legs fell open, encouraging him to come between them, getting as close as possible. When our lips met, the world breathed again, the stars aligned, all those ridiculous metaphors that meant nothing now meant something. Immediately I moaned, opening my mouth and tangling my fingers in his short, soft hair, yanking him closer and wrapping my legs around his waist, digging my heels into the small of his back. It was like coming home, relearning a terrain that was already so familiar to me. His hand released my waist, resting just below my knee and sliding up my leg; with an inpatient, desperate, high pitched noise that was ripped from my throat, I pushed my skirt and petticoat out of the way, arching my body into his, pressing my clothed erection against him. Everything felt like it was burning. I was being burned by him and I wanted it; I wanted to burn and burn everything around me.

It was such a lovely, terrible feeling. Like I was being driven mad.

He disconnected us, allowing us to pant and gulp down air, lips red and swollen, saliva making them glisten.

_"Matthew.”_

God, I loved the sound of my name falling from his parted lips, stressed as if I was some sort of god and, when I was around him, I felt like I could be. How could I forget what this felt like? How could I forget him and all the small, yet life altering moments we shared that were currently racing through my head, filling me back up. I never felt so whole before. I hadn't realized so many pieces of me were missing but, now that I knew, I realized I would never be able to go back to how it once was.

“Gil,” I said, my voice raspy as I choked on a sob, “I remember you. I just… I can't remember how I forgot-.”

“That's not important, mein liebe,” he said, placing kisses on each knuckle of my hand, “What’s important is that you remember.”

“I love you,” I repeated more assuredly, even though my face was damp with the beginnings of tears, “I love you. I'm yours.”

He kissed me again. It was shorter but no less passionate. Perhaps even more so. Full of teeth and tongue and desperation. _“Matthew,”_ he breathed again, resting his forehead on mine, looking pained but relieved.

“Make love to me.”

His breath hitched and, maybe I could see the humor in it, but he lifted me from my chair and I had to wrap my legs around his waist to remain grounded. One of his hands was on my ass, the other on my thigh, and I felt a deep ache settle in my bones. It had been so long since he last touched me, really touched me, and I couldn't stop touching him, running my hands along his back and chest, contorting to press my lips against his neck, taste his pulse and skin with a gentle lap of my tongue before I clamped down and sucked.

“Fuck, Vogelchen-.”

“Find a bed and throw me on it,” I growled, licking and sucking at his earlobe, fingers flexing in his hair, tugging at it, desperately clawing at any part of his body that I could reach, trying to bring him close -and closer still -until we were one person.

He growled animalistically in response -it was much more manly and dangerous, sending a shiver down my spine and even more lust pooling in my abdomen -his fingers bruising my thick flesh as he lurched forward, carrying me to my room. It felt like too much time but no time at all with us biting and sucking at each other’s skin; but, eventually, Gilbert shoved the door to my room open with his foot, tossing me on the bed -I’d never admit it but I squealed as I bounced -before going back to the door to close and lock it. We stood like that, breathing heavily and looking at each other. I made the first move -I always did, I remembered, though I let Gilbert take control awfully quick -by unlacing my boots, keeping my eyes on the albino the entire time and toeing them off my feet.

He quickly followed suit, shrugging his jacket off afterwards. I unbuttoned my frock coat and tossed it over the side of the bed, unlacing the bodice of my dress as Gilbert unbuttoned his shirt. By the time he had gotten his socks and shirt off, half way done with his pants, my petticoat was off and I was slipping my dress off my shoulders, to pool at my feet. I stepped out of my clothes in only my underwear (simple cotton panties that were straining against my cock) and stockings, quietly walking up to the distracted albino to graze my fingers along the scars and bruises on his torso.

“Oh, _Gil_ … there are new ones,” I breathed, pressing more firmly to his chest, feeling the jagged edges beneath my palms.

“What can I say, mein angel? I don’t know how to behave,” he said with a grin, cockiness attempting to hide his sadness and pain.

“I’ll fix this,” I swore as he moved my hand from his chest to his face, kissing my palm and the pulse point in my wrist.

“Shh. Just focus on the here and now, Matthew. On us.”

So I did. I trapped his face between my hands and kissed him again, slow and passionate this time, shivering when I felt his hands on my back, sliding down the length of my spine. _“Gil.”_  

“You can still talk. I must be doing something wrong,” he chuckled, hands sliding beneath my underwear to my ass, squeezing the thick globes as he bent to bite, suck and lick at my neck and collarbone, “What position do you want to be in?”

_What position...?_ I rolled it over in my head, though I was much too distracted with the rippling and flexing of Gilbert’s skin. I lifted my hand to tickle and tease the rabbit ears on top of his head, delighting in the way his breath caught in his throat, before sliding my fingertips down the side of his face, his neck, down his back (I felt the recent lacerations on his back scabbed over with the beginnings of healing, but I buried my anger beneath my soul until I could address it later). “I want to be on my back…” I said at last, quietly, transfixed on the pale skin in front of me. It had been so long since he last touched me and I suddenly realized that I was hungry for him, aching for the closeness sex allowed us. “I want to look at you.”

Next I knew I was on the bed, my back arched as he kissed and sucked bruises down my body, stopping to pay special attention to my nipples, something that had me crying out, thighs shaking and hands twitching. No one had touched me beside him and, who I was now (though that was another question I had, my memories of a childhood with my brother Alfred mixing with these new ones beginning to creep in), no one had touched me ever. It was all familiar and foreign, over stimulating, and by the time his mouth was on my erection, tears were blurring my vision and all I could do was gasp. He worked over me slowly, pleasuring me but not so much that I would be able to finish by his mouth; he moved to lick my inner thighs, spreading my legs. “So beautiful,” Gilbert groaned, teeth grazing my skin and I inhaled shakily, tensing in anticipation, “I want to be inside you.”

“Now. _Please_ , Gil.” I could feel his smirk against my thigh before a wet finger circled my entrance and eased its way inside. The tears that had been threatening to spill finally did and I made a broken sound, feeling the stretch and the pain but my chest feeling simultaneously heavier and lighter because he was _finally inside me_ after so long. I only continued to make those wet, broken sounds as he added more fingers, reduced to gasps and moans and his name as the pain faded and I could only focus on how good everything felt.

“Matthew… Matthew, are you alright?” the albino asked, stopping all movement from the fingers inside me and his lips on my skin.

With a nod, I tried to find the words that escaped me, before I finally found something that may help him understand. “I missed you,” I sobbed, running my hands through his hair, though my knuckles ached from how hard they had been clenched as I fisted the bed sheets, rubbing the base of his rabbit ears. “I missed you, I missed _us._ I didn’t even know who you were but I missed you.”

He made a low, happy sound, looking down at me with gentle eyes, a small smile on his face. “I missed you, too,” he said, pressing his forehead against mine and rubbing our noses together, “but we are together again… and there’s nothing in this world that will keep me from trying to be with you. No matter what.”

“Swear to me. Give me your oath,” I said, voice still wet with tears and restrained sobs, “Swear to me on your life, your brother’s, mine-- swear to me.”

“I give you my word,” Gilbert whispered, the room filled with intimate tension just waiting to snap, “As the gods and the stars as my witness, I swear that I will never stop running to your side, giving you my heart and my soul, no matter what stands in our way.”

I kissed him, feeling so full with emotion that it was begging to be released physically. I tried to show him through the kiss all I was feeling, heavy and passionate and on fire. Clenching my thighs around his hips, I flipped us over so he was on his back and I was straddling his hips, our erections brushing together teasingly. _“You're mine,”_ I said (whimpered), though my tone was factual. Definite. With one hand placed on Gilbert’s chest, I supported myself and grabbed his member with the other. “You're mine. Forever.”

_“Yes.”_

Oh, and there was that dark thing in my chest again, curling around my heart. _He's mine, he's mine, he's mine._ The thought ran through my head, infected my blood, becoming the only thing that sustained me. I never wanted to let him go, never wanted him to discard me or turn from me, I wanted him to need me so he would never even think about doing any of that.

I sunk down on his cock, gasping and groaning at the almost overwhelming burn, though the deeper the organ went, the more familiar the feeling became. It wiped all the dark thoughts from my head and I continued to slide down until there was nothing left. I looked down at Gilbert, his eyes dark and dazed and hungry, muscles straining with self control, and I exhaled shakily, knowing I probably looked similar. “Gil…”

“You gorgeous thing,” he growled, red eyes feral in ways I could only vaguely remember seeing before and a shiver went down my spine, “look at you. So good for me.”

My breath hitched. I couldn’t remember ever being praised so honestly and openly by anyone besides Gilbert and the memories I had of whenever he praised me in the past came creeping in and I was trying not to become overwhelmed… but it was so very hard. “Do I feel good?” I panted, my hands scrambling on his body and trying to find something to grab onto, “As good as you remember?”

_“Better.”_ I gasped as he jerked his hips up, setting my nerves on fire and I dug my nails into his biceps. “You sound better, too.”

“Gil…!” With a feral sound that came from his throat, he flipped me over and jarred the placement of his dick as he lifted my legs and hooked the backs of my knees over his shoulders. He pulled out before he rocked back in long strokes, hitting my deepest places and wringing tears from my eyes (I knew I would be feeling him for days and I knew that he knew that); Gilbert changed his angle a few times until he hit something inside me that had me arching my back, breaking through the haze of pleasure that was starting to sweep me under, and I made a loud, disgusting noise that had me shoving my hand over my mouth. “Oh--!”

“No, Vogelchen,” Gilbert panted, pinning my hands down by my sides before nuzzling into my neck, biting and kissing at my neck sloppily, reaching a spot I didn’t know existed and I moaned, my thighs tightening around him, “I want to hear all those beautiful noises you make for me.”

“Gil, Gilbert,” I moaned, tightening my grip on his hands and arching my back to try and touch more of his skin. He was hitting the spot inside my constantly and I didn’t bother hiding the disgusting noises being drawn out of me, tears dampening my hair and saliva around my mouth as I tried to breathe around the hot waves of pleasure going through me. I was surrounded by Gilbert, my very existence aching for and because of him, and it was as if the stars aligned and everything seemed to make sense; I wondered if it was the locked doors of my memory reopening, and I remembered every moment I had spent with him, every time I had thought of him, all the times I had looked at him and thought “I love you”. It was all building up inside me and, suddenly, it was too much. “I’m going to cum.”

“Then cum,” Gilbert permitted in a strained tone that I knew all too well: it was the tone he had every time he was about to cum, too, “Do it. Let me feel you.”

I sobbed, pulling him closer and kissing him. It was messy and a little gross but, damn, was it perfect. “I love you, Gilbert,” I hiccuped through my tears, peppering kisses along his face and trying to bring him closer, until we wouldn’t be able to pinpoint where the other began and ended. “I love you, I love you, I love--.” I choked on my own words, my eyes rolling in the back of my head as I saw stars, my whole body tensing up. I knew I was cumming although I wasn’t completely aware of it, but I knew that my body was a conductor of pleasure and Gilbert released wetly inside me with a delicious, deep moan that had me twitching for a second time, my body desiring a second climax but it escaped me.

“Vogelchen, mein angel…” he said breathlessly and I felt his lips on my face and neck, his hands unclenching from around my thigh and hip --I didn’t know when that had happened, but I knew from the ache that I would have bruises-- to roam comfortingly over my body, “You are so beautiful…”

“Mmmm, Gil,” I slurred, pressing my forehead against his shoulder, limp and sated, sore in a way I hadn’t been for too long. I felt drunk. “I don’t… Gil…” I didn’t know what I was trying to say but I was desperate for Gilbert to understand, to give me what I needed.

“Shh, it’s ok. I remember,” Gilbert said, easing out of me despite my protests, I didn’t want him to leave me, damn it-- “Let me help you.” He hurried to the attached bathroom, returning soon enough with a warm, wet towel and began to wipe the sweat and semen from my body, placing loving kisses on the patches of skin every time he had finished. I hummed and whined, wiggling around as I was fawned over and lulled into a state between wakefulness and sleep. “Do you need water?” I shook my head, lifting my heavy arms as much as I could and flexing my fingers in his direction, which made him chuckle, a deep sound that rumbled through his chest and made me feel warm. “You want me to cuddle?” I nodded and he laughed again, easing me underneath the thick, soft blankets before sliding in beside me.

He was much warmer than the blankets, his body radiating heat, and I rolled over until my cheek was on his hard chest, his heart beat like a lullabye implanting itself with stubborn, but not unwelcome, intensity. “Don’t go…”

“I have to leave by morning,” Gilbert said and, although I felt a sting of pain, I recognized his remorse and didn’t bring it up, “but we will be together again.”

I stayed silent a long time, just clinging to him and trying to memorize the feeling of his skin beneath my hands as my fingers trailed along his scars, but the words that had been floating around in my head, angry and slighted, eventually fell away and I said, “Thank you for making love to me.” It hadn’t been like our first time, slow and terribly careful, as if I were made of glass, but it was still slow and mindful as we were reunited in body and mind.

“Don’t thank me,” he said with a hard edge to his voice and I looked up, confused, but he quickly cupped my face in one of his large hands and pressed a hard kiss to my lips, “Don’t thank me.”

I nodded, snuggling into his chest and obeying his command without hesitation, the rhythm of his fingers carding through my hair lulling me to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Canada/Matthew as Alice/and he’s a prince wow look at that 
> 
> Prussia/Gilbert as the White Rabbit
> 
> Sweden/Berwald as the Cook
> 
> Finland/Tino as the Duchess
> 
> Denmark/Mathias as a member of court 
> 
> Norway/Lukas as a member of court 
> 
> Iceland/Emil as a member of court


End file.
